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Help In English Please
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Hi everyone, I have already discussed that I was failed two courses and now the embassy wants my transcript and I have to clear them the reason behind this. I wrote an email and I request you to please proofread this, I have uploaded my document on google docs and the link is here and anyone with the link can edit my document. Thank you so much
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My first-semester and my second-semester transcripts are attached, as you requested. However, I found my online classes a hectic experience. For much of the time, I had to deal with poor internet connections and power outages during my lectures, and, because of these difficulties, I was sometimes late in submitting my tasks. In addition, we were allowed to miss only two sessions in whole semesters.
For my English language course, I had to complete my task from my book, which I unfortunately could not deliver on time to my city. I informed my professor of this. (My correspondence with my professor is also attached.)
I tried, however, to do my best in managing my two online semesters, and I am hoping for a positive response from the embassy.
For my English language course, I had to complete my task from my book, which I unfortunately could not deliver on time to my city. I informed my professor of this. (My correspondence with my professor is also attached.)
I tried, however, to do my best in managing my two online semesters, and I am hoping for a positive response from the embassy.
I'm unsure as to whether you're using the word 'transcript' correctly which, given the nature of your communication, would seem to be extremely important!
The definition of 'transcript' is 'a written or printed version of material originally presented in another medium'. [e.g. a transcript of a radio broadcast will have the words of the interview (or play, or whatever) typed out]. I don't know what 'transcript' means in your draft document and, if can't understand it, there's a very good chance that the recipient won't be able to either. So, irrespective of any other changes that might be needed, you need to substitute an alternative word there? (I can't actually suggest one though, precisely because I don't understand what it is that you're actually writing about!).
In both this document and previous emails you've written about, you've used the word 'professor' as an occupation. In English 'professor' tends to be only used as a title for the head of a university faculty (or a department within a faculty). e.g. 'Professor Jones' or 'Professor Fernandez'. It's not usually used to refer to an occupation; it would be more natural to refer to 'my tutor', 'my course leader' or 'the head of my faculty' than to 'my professor'.
As it stands, your proposed email seems very muddled. Something along the following lines might be better. (In the absence of any knowledge about what you actually mean by 'transcripts', I've substituted 'reports' but you might need to amend that):
"As per your request, I attach reports from the first and second semesters of my course at the University of Siegen.
My studies were made exceptionally difficult for me by an inadequate internet connection, together with some power outages, during many of my lectures. As a result, I was sometimes late in submitting my coursework, meaning that I was unable to attain the standard that I know I might otherwise have achieved.
My English language course was also hampered by a delay in receiving the text book upon which assignments were based. (I advised the course leader of this problem and I attach copies of my correspondence with him on this matter).
I hope that, by being able to attend future semesters in person, I will be able to put these problems behind me and go on to achieve the high standards in my coursework that I know I am capable of.
I hope for a positive response from your Embassy and I look forward to hearing from you soon"
The definition of 'transcript' is 'a written or printed version of material originally presented in another medium'. [e.g. a transcript of a radio broadcast will have the words of the interview (or play, or whatever) typed out]. I don't know what 'transcript' means in your draft document and, if can't understand it, there's a very good chance that the recipient won't be able to either. So, irrespective of any other changes that might be needed, you need to substitute an alternative word there? (I can't actually suggest one though, precisely because I don't understand what it is that you're actually writing about!).
In both this document and previous emails you've written about, you've used the word 'professor' as an occupation. In English 'professor' tends to be only used as a title for the head of a university faculty (or a department within a faculty). e.g. 'Professor Jones' or 'Professor Fernandez'. It's not usually used to refer to an occupation; it would be more natural to refer to 'my tutor', 'my course leader' or 'the head of my faculty' than to 'my professor'.
As it stands, your proposed email seems very muddled. Something along the following lines might be better. (In the absence of any knowledge about what you actually mean by 'transcripts', I've substituted 'reports' but you might need to amend that):
"As per your request, I attach reports from the first and second semesters of my course at the University of Siegen.
My studies were made exceptionally difficult for me by an inadequate internet connection, together with some power outages, during many of my lectures. As a result, I was sometimes late in submitting my coursework, meaning that I was unable to attain the standard that I know I might otherwise have achieved.
My English language course was also hampered by a delay in receiving the text book upon which assignments were based. (I advised the course leader of this problem and I attach copies of my correspondence with him on this matter).
I hope that, by being able to attend future semesters in person, I will be able to put these problems behind me and go on to achieve the high standards in my coursework that I know I am capable of.
I hope for a positive response from your Embassy and I look forward to hearing from you soon"
Thank you so much for your response.
@Buenchico I have googled about a transcript and its definition is "In education, a transcript is a certified record of a student throughout a course of study having full enrollment history including all courses attempted, grades earned, and degrees and awards conferred."
@Buenchico I have googled about a transcript and its definition is "In education, a transcript is a certified record of a student throughout a course of study having full enrollment history including all courses attempted, grades earned, and degrees and awards conferred."
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