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sex with condom
16 Answers
hi, iv been with my bf for six years and we have never had sex without a condom.
this is serious q.
we are both afraid to use any other contreception i.e the pill the coil etc, as this is not 100%
we do want kids in the future but not at this moment and that is what we are afraid of?
so my question is am i missing anything by using a condom? i mean is it better without?
he is my first sexual partner.
this is serious q.
we are both afraid to use any other contreception i.e the pill the coil etc, as this is not 100%
we do want kids in the future but not at this moment and that is what we are afraid of?
so my question is am i missing anything by using a condom? i mean is it better without?
he is my first sexual partner.
Answers
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You do know that condoms are not 100% safe as well don't you though?NOTHING is 100%.
If I were you I'd consdier the pill as well to be honest if you definately don't want children yet a while as apart from protecting you from STD's condoms aren't the most reliable form of contraception by a long way, however the two combined are almost foolproof.
I personally, like most men, hate condoms but that's my preference. Since you are in an exclusive relationship I assume the std angle is probably not what concerns you, so look for advice from professionals as personally I think condoms are real passion killers and once you are taking the pill maybe try sex without at an unlikely point in your cycle and see what you both think.
If I were you I'd consdier the pill as well to be honest if you definately don't want children yet a while as apart from protecting you from STD's condoms aren't the most reliable form of contraception by a long way, however the two combined are almost foolproof.
I personally, like most men, hate condoms but that's my preference. Since you are in an exclusive relationship I assume the std angle is probably not what concerns you, so look for advice from professionals as personally I think condoms are real passion killers and once you are taking the pill maybe try sex without at an unlikely point in your cycle and see what you both think.
Most people would agree that it is more sensual without the physical barrier that, by their very nature condoms create. However, no contraception can be guaranteed 100% safe and many practitioners recommend that for maximum protection some forms are combined (i.e. pill & condom).
If you and your partner are serious enough about your relationship, then your doctor or family planning clinic can help you choose a method of contraception to suit you both. You can also call the fpa's helpline on 0845 310 1334 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 6pm) or visit www.fpa.org.uk for further details.
If you and your partner are serious enough about your relationship, then your doctor or family planning clinic can help you choose a method of contraception to suit you both. You can also call the fpa's helpline on 0845 310 1334 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 6pm) or visit www.fpa.org.uk for further details.
Condoms are a barrier method, so are safer with regards to contracting diseases (the pill & IUD etc provide no protection against STDs)
However, according to this source condoms are less safe with regards to pregnancy:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/slink/sexlovelife/index.s html?page=body&sub=contraception
However, according to this source condoms are less safe with regards to pregnancy:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/slink/sexlovelife/index.s html?page=body&sub=contraception
Only for a while in my case!
Seriously, I agree with nox. I didn't want to jump in and recommend not using condoms at all and disregard STDs, so I let him do that for me ;o)
If STDs really aren't an issue (and you have to be 100% sure on that) then I would switch to something else. Either the injection, implants or pill. The coil is supposed to be better for women who have already had children, but I hear that they have introduced ones suited for childless women nowadays.
Seriously, I agree with nox. I didn't want to jump in and recommend not using condoms at all and disregard STDs, so I let him do that for me ;o)
If STDs really aren't an issue (and you have to be 100% sure on that) then I would switch to something else. Either the injection, implants or pill. The coil is supposed to be better for women who have already had children, but I hear that they have introduced ones suited for childless women nowadays.
The only problem with relying on the pill alone is that if you have some kind of gastric upset which involves vomiting, the effect of your daily pill will be lost, and just one day without it could possibly allow pregnancy to happen. If you absolutely don't want kids at the moment, go for belt and braces !
That is why I recommended the injection or implants, Wendy. I see so many posts on AB asking about whether they have taken the pill properly it scares me.
I am sure sarah27 is very sensible, in fact I can tell from her Q that she has her head screwed on the correct way ~ but so many young girls go on the pill without reading the leaflets provided or listening properly to the GP.
My sister had the implants as (due to her own admission) she was a 'dozy cow' who used to forget her pill after having a skinfull on a night out.
I am sure sarah27 is very sensible, in fact I can tell from her Q that she has her head screwed on the correct way ~ but so many young girls go on the pill without reading the leaflets provided or listening properly to the GP.
My sister had the implants as (due to her own admission) she was a 'dozy cow' who used to forget her pill after having a skinfull on a night out.
Hi sarah27,
I personally would not go down the route of the pill, it's a hormone that you don't need in your system and your body will be completely natural and with a natural cycle atm.
I also wouldn't introduce a coil into a body that has not had children and for heavens sake do not even think about a mirena coil.
So..... I guess I am very negative towards anything hormonal ( I suffered on trying 6 different pills and the coil lol )..... but...... I do use a cap.... no problems and no babies....... and great for feeling.....
Go to your Doc or family planning after you have read up and gathered all the information you need.....
Make an informed decision hun, your body is very important.
Take Care.
B. :-)
I personally would not go down the route of the pill, it's a hormone that you don't need in your system and your body will be completely natural and with a natural cycle atm.
I also wouldn't introduce a coil into a body that has not had children and for heavens sake do not even think about a mirena coil.
So..... I guess I am very negative towards anything hormonal ( I suffered on trying 6 different pills and the coil lol )..... but...... I do use a cap.... no problems and no babies....... and great for feeling.....
Go to your Doc or family planning after you have read up and gathered all the information you need.....
Make an informed decision hun, your body is very important.
Take Care.
B. :-)
It's supposed to be better without a condom. But personally I can feel very little difference and I actually slightly prefer with. The only thing that annoys me about condoms is having to stop in the heat of the moment and put one on!
Why don't you have a word with your doctor or local Family Planning clinic, and ask them the same question? You'll be able to discuss all the options (there are probably more than you think) and you can take your man with you too, if you/he want.
Also, as others have said the pill (for example) is 99% effective while condoms are only 97%.
Personally I would take these percentages with a pinch of salt as they do take into account people not using them properly. If you're using contraception properly there shouldn't be any problems.
Why don't you have a word with your doctor or local Family Planning clinic, and ask them the same question? You'll be able to discuss all the options (there are probably more than you think) and you can take your man with you too, if you/he want.
Also, as others have said the pill (for example) is 99% effective while condoms are only 97%.
Personally I would take these percentages with a pinch of salt as they do take into account people not using them properly. If you're using contraception properly there shouldn't be any problems.
We don't need condoms now, but they were our preferred method of contraception when it was required.
Obviously I can't speak for my wife on this, but I think if a man is makng love properly, the issue of a condom or not is irrelavent - he should be using any and all means to ensure his partner is enjoying the experience.
As a previous condom-wearer, I found that the inhibited sensation enabled me to ... continue ... longer than without, which is a plus, but I certainly don't miss them!
I think as mature adults we work around these issues - if anyone finds the break in proceedings to put one on is a turn-off, then make it part of the proceedings, rather than a sigh and a moan and a 'Hang on a min ...' situation.
Obviously I can't speak for my wife on this, but I think if a man is makng love properly, the issue of a condom or not is irrelavent - he should be using any and all means to ensure his partner is enjoying the experience.
As a previous condom-wearer, I found that the inhibited sensation enabled me to ... continue ... longer than without, which is a plus, but I certainly don't miss them!
I think as mature adults we work around these issues - if anyone finds the break in proceedings to put one on is a turn-off, then make it part of the proceedings, rather than a sigh and a moan and a 'Hang on a min ...' situation.
you should definately consider other forms (pill/injection etc). it is very liberating to be the one in control & to be honest its prob safer than condoms anyway.
2 things to consider though. its very stressfull if you forget to take the pill & your life kind of flashes before your eyes for a while. also when you use a condom- its his problem to clean up when the jobs done. if you dont use a condom its your problem & its not all that pleasant!
2 things to consider though. its very stressfull if you forget to take the pill & your life kind of flashes before your eyes for a while. also when you use a condom- its his problem to clean up when the jobs done. if you dont use a condom its your problem & its not all that pleasant!
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