is the best form of exercise. Now correct me if I'm
wrong but I don't think 2 minutes and 15 seconds every 3 months is
going to shift this beer belly....
Boy comes home from school and tells his dad he's been picked for the school play. His dad congratulates him and asks what part he's been given. The lad tells him it's a man who has been married for...
woman answers. The pervert, with heavy breathing, says, "I bet you have a real tight Yabbie with no hair?" Woman replies, "Yes, he's watching the television - who shall I say is...
Tony Blair and his driver are in a hurry, so they are speeding past several farms. On their way past one of the farms Tony's driver hits a pig. He stops the car and decides he had better tell the...
He seems to be claiming that his blades provide no advantage when he competes against able bodied athletes, but longer blades worn by the guy who won gold gave him an unfair advantage. Sour grapes or...
A devout Muslim entered a black cab in London. He curtly asked the cabbie to turn off the radio because as decreed by his religious teaching, he must not listen to music because in the time of the...
A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by. Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"...
A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet. Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat." Vet: "Is it a tom?" Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it with us."...
Husband says to wife, "My Olympic condoms have arrived ... I think I'll wear Gold tonight."
Wife says, "Why not wear Silver and come second for a change."...
A Muslim family was considering putting their grandfather into a nursing home. All the Muslim facilities were completely full so they had to put him into an Italian home. After a few weeks in the...
