ChatterBank1 min ago
"Sibling Rivalry!"
9 Answers
Hullo, it's me again with a question about our new border collie pup (I always ask here first because you seem like such a knowledgeable lot).
We've had Jasmine for 3 weeks now and she's 9 months old. Most of the time she does her best to be as good as gold, but as soon as our grandchildren arrive she reverts to babyhood. She constantly wees on the carpets, she chews things, she runs off and won't come back when she's called and if she's in the room with them she goes completely mad and tears about crashing into things, whilst they cower in the corner!
She is not remotely aggressive towards them, and greets them with delight when they arrive, but they tend to leap away from her when she gets over zealous (they are 3 and 6yrs old), and this winds her up even more.
Since I am not prepared to choose between them, she has to get used to them being here one night and one full day a week, plus certain weekends, and I'd be very grateful if anybody could suggest how I go about dealing with this. Yesterday I got the definite impression that she was quite happy to be told off, as long as she was getting the attention, and having been shut out in the conservatory as a punishment for soaking the carpet, I went out, stroked her, gave her a treat, brought her back in and she instantly did it again!
This morning, now they've gone home again, she's as good as gold! Grrrrr!!!!
We've had Jasmine for 3 weeks now and she's 9 months old. Most of the time she does her best to be as good as gold, but as soon as our grandchildren arrive she reverts to babyhood. She constantly wees on the carpets, she chews things, she runs off and won't come back when she's called and if she's in the room with them she goes completely mad and tears about crashing into things, whilst they cower in the corner!
She is not remotely aggressive towards them, and greets them with delight when they arrive, but they tend to leap away from her when she gets over zealous (they are 3 and 6yrs old), and this winds her up even more.
Since I am not prepared to choose between them, she has to get used to them being here one night and one full day a week, plus certain weekends, and I'd be very grateful if anybody could suggest how I go about dealing with this. Yesterday I got the definite impression that she was quite happy to be told off, as long as she was getting the attention, and having been shut out in the conservatory as a punishment for soaking the carpet, I went out, stroked her, gave her a treat, brought her back in and she instantly did it again!
This morning, now they've gone home again, she's as good as gold! Grrrrr!!!!
Answers
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Sounds like a jealousy/confusion problem for her. Maybe size wise she sees the children as a threat to your attention. Do you know her former history with children as she was 8 months when you got her. Was she a rescue dog?
The good thing is that border colllies are quite easy to train (I had a bc x springer for 17 years). I really think you may need professional help from a dog expert. She sounds like a sweetie and well worth persevering with - let us know what happens and good luck.
The good thing is that border colllies are quite easy to train (I had a bc x springer for 17 years). I really think you may need professional help from a dog expert. She sounds like a sweetie and well worth persevering with - let us know what happens and good luck.
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Oh thank you both so much for your advice. Yes, Sally, she is a rescue dog and there apparently was an 18 month old in the home she came from, whom she regularly knocked over. I don't know for sure, but I think as a result they used to keep her shut up in an upstairs room most of the time.
Your advice, Zacsmaster is brilliant and when the children arrive tomorrow I shall follow it exactly. I hadn't thought about the pack mentality - and of course I should have done. Also I shall try and be firmer in putting her out into the conservatory, it's just that she sits there looking so sorry that I then give in - more fool me!
We had a border collie, greyhound cross last time and it certainly won us over where b c's are concerned - hence we drove more than 500 miles there and back to collect her because we wanted her so much. She is so clever and so quick to learn, it's amazing!
Your advice, Zacsmaster is brilliant and when the children arrive tomorrow I shall follow it exactly. I hadn't thought about the pack mentality - and of course I should have done. Also I shall try and be firmer in putting her out into the conservatory, it's just that she sits there looking so sorry that I then give in - more fool me!
We had a border collie, greyhound cross last time and it certainly won us over where b c's are concerned - hence we drove more than 500 miles there and back to collect her because we wanted her so much. She is so clever and so quick to learn, it's amazing!
Hey julia, big hugs for your BC, I remember you asking advice when you first got her, and I am so pleased to hear she's doing well!
My BC definitely sees kids as a threat, but he has never been around them in a day-to-day situ, and I doubt he will need to be. It sounds like Jasmine is just excitable, and as has been said in the excellent advice already, a little baffled about where she stnds-especially as your grandkids aren't around all the time. Make sure they are firm with her-it's important that there's no-one she can sneak to for more lenient treatment! Get them involved in her training, they will love it and she will also be less baffled!
Bear in mind that a lot of Collies nip kiddy heels, and make sure they are as calm as possible around her-no sudden movements or loud noises, which can be alarming for a dog, and especially a BC.
Let us know how it goes!
My BC definitely sees kids as a threat, but he has never been around them in a day-to-day situ, and I doubt he will need to be. It sounds like Jasmine is just excitable, and as has been said in the excellent advice already, a little baffled about where she stnds-especially as your grandkids aren't around all the time. Make sure they are firm with her-it's important that there's no-one she can sneak to for more lenient treatment! Get them involved in her training, they will love it and she will also be less baffled!
Bear in mind that a lot of Collies nip kiddy heels, and make sure they are as calm as possible around her-no sudden movements or loud noises, which can be alarming for a dog, and especially a BC.
Let us know how it goes!
I suggest you get her a crate which she can use as a den to get away from the kids, and for you to put her into when you want to have some quiet time without her tearing around. Do not use it as a punishment, let her go in and out as she wants and only shut the door when you need to.
Give her a bone or a pigs ear to chew while she is in there.
Get the children involved in her training, take her for a walk with them and let them throw a toy for her.
You hit the nail right oh the heard when you said she was happy to be told off as it is attention, much like a naughty child who will deliberately do something they know they will get told off for just to get attention. Ensure it is you who decides when she has your attention. Playing, eating, even a fuss should all be done when YOU decide not her.
I would try to cut down the amount of time she is 'forced' to be with the children (dog knows I would hate it myself!). Supervise the time they spend together, if necessary keep her on a lead and make her lie down in the room while they are playing. Make sure of course the children respect her and her toys etc. Good luck.
Give her a bone or a pigs ear to chew while she is in there.
Get the children involved in her training, take her for a walk with them and let them throw a toy for her.
You hit the nail right oh the heard when you said she was happy to be told off as it is attention, much like a naughty child who will deliberately do something they know they will get told off for just to get attention. Ensure it is you who decides when she has your attention. Playing, eating, even a fuss should all be done when YOU decide not her.
I would try to cut down the amount of time she is 'forced' to be with the children (dog knows I would hate it myself!). Supervise the time they spend together, if necessary keep her on a lead and make her lie down in the room while they are playing. Make sure of course the children respect her and her toys etc. Good luck.
Oh thank you all so much for the advice, and all of it so good. She's just such a sweetie, with beautiful almond shaped eyes and those lovely, fluffy ears that perk up with interest at almost everything. Every morning at around 5.30 she sticks her nose into my face and then as far as she's concerned the day has started and it's time to be off enjoying life! And she's guaranteed to keep me young. I just wish most of our early morning walks weren't taken in the pouring rain - it IS supposed to be the height of summer, isn't it?!!!
Went to the New Forest Show yesterday and honestly it was like a World War 1 battlefield. I've never seen so much mud in my life and you had to be really careful where you trod, because sometimes it was eight or ten inches deep! We had a great day, but it abruptly halted at 3pm when the Heaven's opened and it simply chucked down. I've never seen rain like it, I got drenched to the skin in about two minutes!!!
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