Aged Parents And Illness

[cassa333]

Hi,

My parents are 73 and 79 and although relatively fit/active do get the usual older persons illnesses such as colds and aching bones and stuff. Dad has CLL and mum has asthma.

Do any of the medical people here think that them having to look after a 4yr old (sent home from nursery) and a 7yr old that have diahrea and sickness and generally under the weather is a good idea?

Now mum has come down with bronchitis and has been told to rest by the Dr we are wondering if the two sick boys contributed to her getting so ill.

Thank you

[Sqad]

Perhaps it is not a good idea, but many ideas are not.
Is there an alternative here? Anyone else to look after the kids?
If the latter is an option then it should be considered.

Reading between the lines grandma and grandpa are the only option.

I don't know how badly Dad is suffering from CLL or indeed what treatment he is having. CLL may be symptomless or indeed it may be fatiguing Dad.

I can't answer your question, concerning the advisability of looking after the kids, but i doubt very much that they have contributed in any way to the exacerbation of Mum's bronchitis.

[pixie374]

How do your parents feel about the childcare? Do they think it's too much for them? Do they enjoy it?

[cassa333]

Mum and dad just wouldn't say no. They are the first option all the time. Regardless of how they are feeling.

One reason I am not happy with the boys being parmmed off on them is that the day the boys were sick thier mum doesn't work and wanted to go to the hairdressers but left them there all day.

[jennyjoan]

I personally think that grandparents are taken for granted. Did you ever ask your mother and father "would you look after our kids" verbally. Most if not all of the grandparents I know have never been ASKED. Just taken for granted that they will look after them.

Do you the young ones never think "well they have reared us" now it is time for them (ie grand parents) to have time out. Particularly at 73 and 79 - far too old for that responsibility.

[anneasquith]

Conne. Where have you been? Excuse me cases.

[jennyjoan]

Hi Anne - been nowhere and then again been to hell - who the hell hasn't been. LOL.

Thanks for enquiring Anne. Conne

[tonyav]

Good to see you posting again, jj.

[jennyjoan]

Ahhhh thank you Tony.

[Cloverjo]

Perhaps you should say something to this selfish mother about how they were worn out and became more ill after having the boys all day.

[eanceoil]

jennyjoan, did you read all of cassa's thread, she's not happy by the looks of it either, It's not cassa dumping the children on her parents

[jennyjoan]

I agree Clover - some of my friends are all doing it - aged 67-70 looking after 1 year old and picking up 3 year olds from nursery. Godddddddddddddddddd - makes me sick.

[anneasquith]

Wolfe was "" looking for you "" last week.

[jennyjoan]

Anne - who is Wolfe - would that be either Wolfgang? or Wolf 63 the lady with the pussys.

[eanceoil]

wolf with the cats

[jennyjoan]

Ean - I did look at all of the posting - do you not think the grandparents should not have been roped in at all. If you want kids then look after them yourself. Sorry, my version.

My mother died at 68 and had about 11 grandchildren at the time - never once was she called upon to even babysit cos you know they had the utmost respect for my mum who had reared in effect two families.

1. Her own mother and father died when she was 16 years old and so she took all the responsibility of looking after 4 sisters and one brother - baby was 3 years old.

2. Then she married and had 8 pregnancies - 6 lived and she worked all her life - maybe earning £5 a week in a job sewing 9-5pm.

No no no - grandparents should not be in that position at all.

[eanceoil]

It's just you seemed to go off on a rant at the op, she wasn't the person leaving the children with her parents, that's why I asked, I wouldn't look after mine

[eanceoil]

that was, I wouldn't look after my grandchildren, I did look after my own

[jennyjoan]

Sqad

"Reading between the lines grandma and grandpa are the only option".

Why should grandparents be the only option - if you don't have any other options ie one parent coming out of work - then tie your dick in a dicky bow and don't have any.

Right now I know a young couple aged 25 and 27 due a little one in June and already they are planning for it to go to a local creche.

Makes me sad for the little one. you betcha

[jennyjoan]

Ean - why wouldn't you look after your grandchildren since you think I had a rant.

[maggiebee]

My best friend is 72 and her husband is 76. She has triplet grandchildren aged 6 and has had them since they were babies. Thought it would get better when they went to school - however, she goes to her daughter's house every morning to help get them ready for school and picks them up from school at 3 pm and keeps them till their mother comes home from work. Where there father is in all of this I've no idea as he is never mentioned. My friend also takes them to the dancing, swimming etc. etc. and pays for everything. I can see she is very tired at times but what can I do or say. I just have my own thoughts but keep out of it.