depression how can I help

[lilacben]

I have a daughter,35 nearly, who has been suffering depression since the birth of her thild baby 11 months ago. The depression has only been known by me since december.She has seen her doctor and he has put her on antidepressents. But by now they should be working but they arent. She has also own up to self harming.In december but not since.At least I hope not. I had noticed this week she has been down but just now I had her on the phone in floods of tears and when I managed to calm her down she says she is a horrible person and hates herself. I tried to talk calmly to her and got her to talk a little but not sure if it has done much good. Her partner got her to phone me because she was crying so much he didnt know what to do.Is there anyone on here that can tell me how to cope and what to do or say in this situation.? I feel I could do or say something helpful but what.?

[tickledtrout]

So sorry to hear what you and your family are going through. There is not much advice I can give really except to say that she needs to get back to the doctor, I work with a woman who has been on anti depressents since the birth of her son 10 years ago and she was sent for counselling by her doctor

[andy-hughes]

This disease is in its way as bad for the loved ones of the sufferer, as it is for the sufferer themselves.

All you can do is be there for her. That means being ready and willing to listen when she is able to talk - and more importantly, understanding when she is unable.

Depression makes you hate yourself - deeply, and because you feel no sewlf-worth, you figure that everyone else should hate you as much, so you invest considerable time and effort in making yourself as hateful as possible.

So, when she is utterly cruel and hurtful to you, ignore it. It is not your daughter, it's her illness.

Be patient, she will get her personality back, and be the woman you know and love, but this difficult time has to be lived through first.

Remember at all times, it's no-one's fault - not hers, not yours, and she will get through this, with your love and support.