Need advice and a chat pls x

[tinkerbell23]

If ur best friend had this bf who is an arse! Been in jail alot etc....
And they finished
And randomly in the street for nothing he verbally and physicslly abused u, police involved etc.....

Then u find out shes Back with him, but not because she has had the decency to tell u , but through someonelses facebook.....and you still havent been told.

How would u feel, and what would u do xxxxx

[ladyalex]

Steer clear of them both.

[Arti]

It sounds like the 'best friend' bit is only one-way.

[scotman]

^^^^^^^^
What she said

[classylady60]

I can only speak how I would feel and this is gutted. I would take time out and stay away from her/them for a little while to gather my thoughts and think what the best course would be. Sorry to hear you feel like this and that you feel bad about your friend letting you down. Hugs x

[sara3]

agreed. she's an idiot.

is he being prosecuted?

[China Doll]

Take a step back, leave communications open but probably not get in touch myself. Basically leave her to live her life without interference from yourself (but the knowledge that you are there) which will also distance yourself from the drama which would probably only serve to have a negative effect on your own well being. There's not much you can do about bad choices others make, we all make bad choices from time to time and you just have to hope that sense will prevail.

[anneasquith]

dont do anything..

[DTCwordfan]

agree with ladyalex there - there are many other nicer fish in the sea of life to get to know.

[Lore]

It would be in your best interest to move on, tink. It's a not worth getting into.

[welshlibranr]

I would do nothing at all!...........stay clear!..............

[karenmac60]

Tinks, my friend who has the panic attacks has them because she was in an abusive relationship for years - he had been in jail and was big trouble, but she was terrified of him. They split up and he moved away and I told her she was well rid and not to get back with him etc. I didn't see her for a couple of months after that conversation and then she eventually told me they were back together. she's only gone back cos he had threatened her (which she didn't tell me till years later and they had split for good), but she hadn't wanted to tell me they were back cos she thought I'd go mad at her and she knew I'd be right if I did. Don't be too hard on your pal - you don't know all the circumstances, and don't take it personally, she's probably been too embarrassed to tell you cos of all the grief he gave you x

[tinkerbell23]

Thanks all really THANKS i know you are right. Next day sara the police came, and said i coukd prosecute however i was in catch 22..... He Would do a few days then be fined and let out....then the fun really would begin as thy said it really wasnt the crime of century. Im mad cos he gets away with thngs all the time...but he knows were i stay. I tried to keep it from mum and dad....but police at door at 9am didnt help !

I dnt thnk iv ever ever been so hurt. I dont thnk she has the first clue what he dont that night tho ive told her. Luckily i have another mate who was there and understands hiw bad it was. Im so hurt and upset i even feel like im betraying her asking for advice.

Im not a door mat but im loyal...i thnk its mistaken for weakness x

[tinkerbell23]

Ps he text her that night and said to tell me i was lucky that time. X

[askyourgran]

Her loss, leave her to her fate with the t*sser. I'd feel very let down in your shoes, and upset but I would never get involved with her again.

[sara3]

stay away from them, tinkerbell.. they sound like they deserve each other. I am sorry for you.

[tinkerbell23]

Point taken karen. I know everything and i mean everything there is to know....but i cant c why she takes him back. He actually slapped me before about two yrs ago but made out like it was a joke so all was forgiven....it wasnt a joke. Realy it wasnt, it was in the face, wasnt sore but its the principle. So really. This is the 2nd time. My parents dont know that as it really would be curtains!! Dont want my dad getting involved or male family as NO JOKE...i think that guy would stab them. Someone once tried to slit his thoat. X

[tinkerbell23]

I really appreciate the sympathy i really really do, its so good on here for a pick me up.

Just weary today. WOrking 50hrs a week plus exams ....lookn forward to holiday in 3wks lol. But i feel so let down.

I know it sounds childish "facebook this facebook that" but we use it alot, and also another friend who is usually a gossip had "liked" the message she had left him saying love u etc....which makes me feel so stupid that even close friends know and ive been decieved, good old tink to be there wen needed and dropped when not. X

[20SilkCut]

Tinkerbell - as others have said above - best to let them get on with it. The more you have contact with them, the more angst etc it will be for you. I hope your friend realises soon that she is better off without this bloke! Keep yourself safe, and out of their drama. He sounds like a nightmare.

[tinkerbell23]

Thanks silk.....my stomachs away and everything :0(

[20SilkCut]

See tinkerbell, its affecting you so much - and its not even your boyfriend,

You have enough on your plate to be dealing with other peoples crap! Look after no 1 - you! x