I am gutted, I have found out to my cost my handsome dear hubby has been having a

[alinic]

txt affair for the past 3mths, we are around 44ish and been married for about 23 yrs, not in a good place at the moment, friend was supposed to come and chat with me tonight but she has had a smash in her car, but thank the lord shes okay. I have help friends thro their break up, but what happens when its you! Cant believe in the click of a switch your life changes in an instant! Dont know what I am asking here tonight, but haven't cried yet! my emotions are all over the place.
I have posted on here on and off for a few years, but this has been the hardest to post
A

[alinic]

Thanks for all your support, not been able to think straight all day, he slept in the spare room last night, We (had) until last night a great marriage in all aspects, I cant believe in the flick of a switch, my whole marriage crumbled last night, i think this is going to be a long difficult road, we have a son still at home and is still early on in his high school.
He did phone a while ago from work and asked if our marriage was over I said I didnt know and needed the time to get my head round this, which I think I wont. I have only sopken to my best friend as I dont what anybody else knowing. Thanks for all your kind words and thoughts on this very much appreciated

[Ankou]

come back to us whenever you need to.

[alinic]

Ankou how did your marraige work out? after your wifes txt affair? Do you trust her now?

[Ankou]

in truth its difficult to answer that with any great confidence.
we are still married, and love each other very much. we are still rebuilding the trust.

somedays i don't think about it at all, then other days its the 'only' thing i think about.

but we discussed everything from day 1 i found out, in great detail. it hurt but helped.

[trt]

I think you need to tell us how your hubby started the txt affair if you want proper advice, as he must have been in contact with her on-line or has met her somewhere to exchange mobile numbers, or is it someone from where he works?

[Cowtipper]

Don't end your marriage over this Alinic. After 23 years of life together you've surely run over some rough ground before. Call him back. He needs to know that its not over.

[NOX]

If it's only a 'txt affair' which after all is not an affair, it's at worst a breach of trust, then talk to him. Find out why he felt he needed to do that. If you can't open up a line of communication then your marriage will flounder and after 23 years that would be a great pity over what might simjply be an error of judgement from someone feeling lonely. I know you feel rotten, but try to get in perspective what has happened, your husband has not had an affair, he's text someone.

[Purple_Popple]

This is such a shame and so distressing to read about...I dont know what is wrong with couples these days, so many of them result to affairs and thanks to the wonderful invention of the internet and mobile phones it makes it even easier to do..i see it all too readily around people i know in work and socially 'messing' about regardless if they are married or have a partner..it boils down to lack of respect for that partner and it is just wrong...I know of 2 young males who are friends of a friend of mine and they both text her all the time, she is married, and they are all in relationships, she quite happily shows me the texts and they are quite intimate...its really not on, but people just dont seem to bother..again lack of respect.

[Purple_Popple]

If you want monogamy, marry a swan :(

[sara3]

has he ended it with the other woman?

[TTG]

Check out a few videos of Silvia Saint. Learn what she does and he will never, ever have an affair.

[alinic]

Just an update on my post, we have talked at great lenght and are going to try and work this out, I thank all of you for your advice and hope to put this saga behind us, it was a woman whom we both know, was txting and I believe him when he said nothing happened, at the moment hes in the spare room eating a very large humble pie!
So hopefully things will settle down, he has put it down to being flatterd, (if I had the strengh i would flatten him)!

[arwyn]

alinic good for you, work at it, I hope you both come through this, flattery can make people do silly things.