I dont speak to friends who dont messages me and calls me even though i do like them

[sathyamoorthy56]

I dont speak to friends who dont messages me and calls me even though i do like them. If someone cares me i will care them back. If i voluntarily go and speak with them i feel that iam losing my self respect,Especially with girls. Is this attitude right?

[Canary42]

No, it's immature.

[bubzoo]

Nope! everyone has his/her way of showing their concern ... they might not call or sms you but might be there when you need them the most! also, remember Real Friend are hard to come by, i don't kknow your age but if you think you have lots of friend then you are mistaken, with the passage of time you will realizie that you are left with only a few who are always there for you .. those are your friends and the rest were just acquaintances .. so don't worry, relax !

[Dee Sa]

how old are you ?

[WELSHYORKIE]

Am I right in thinking you are not UK based sathya? I have a feeling you may be in a culture where values are different to those in the UK. We do not consider it 'below ourselves' to contact friends - this is normal for us.

[pink-kittens]

And if you care you will call them =)

However, constantly being the person in any relationship who consistently makes the effort when the other party doesn't, is very draining. I have had a few people like that in my life and funnily enough when I stopped calling/contacting them I didn't speak to them again
Can't be bothered with people who can't be bothered!

[boxtops]

You're right welsh, sathya is in India (from previous posts). Here, it's certainly not losing self-respect to contact friends (as they do to you) - how do you keep any friends if you don't answer their calls, and you don't feel that you can call them? We would think that strange, people stop trying in the end if you are not communicative.

[BagPussAA]

surely, if your friends had the same attitude as you.. you would never speak to each other at all! If you won't call them and they won't call you then it is stalemate

[Cowtipper]

I don't always call people back but its pretty rude. I'm more likely to text message if I don't feel like taking. Almost all of my friends are female so I don't understand what you're talking about when you say loose your self respect.

[milly143]

That's what I was thinking BagPuss. What if your mates think the same, you're all just going to be sat around waiting for the other one to call.

[Old_Geezer]

Reading between the words searching for some meaning; you are saying you never make the first contact ? I think a friend would try a number of times to contact before they should give up. They may not know the circumstances as to why they can't be called or messaged first. Maybe a lost phone number ?

[joko]

it works both ways...you are complianing that they dont contact you - but by your 'logic' they would lose self respect if they did...

would you think less of them if they contacted you? no, so why woudl they think it of you?

i agree its frustrating when you are the one making all the effort, but if any of my pals felt it beneath them to contact me then they would no longer be my friend

you are being immature and arrogant.