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orange-gnome | 04:03 Mon 20th Jun 2005 | Body & Soul
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...as "dealing with a pervert"
A few years back I lived in Staines for a short time (yeah I know!). Anyway, while walking my dog in the park a group of little girls about nine years old started shouting abuse at me for no reason. I ignored them at first and carried on walking round anyway eventually they caught up with me and literally started kicking my bum! Obviously I wasn't about to get beaten up or anything (I was 20) they weren't that strong but it did hurt when all 12 or so were doing it over and over!
My jack russell not liking it started barking at them so a couple of them started after him, at which point I really got angry, I shouted at them to leave him and pulled them away. They left him alone then but started worse on me telling me I couldn't touch them coz I would get in trouble!
I just walked out of the park and in the direction of home but they followed me still kicking me, lots of people saw and of course did nothing. After a while I pushed the ring leader over (not hurting her), it didnt stop them. They only stopped when they saw more of their friends down the road in the other direction. It has always bothered me that I couldn't do more to stop them, they were so fearless! I was so humiliated!
What would you do? btw I had no phone on me
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I would defend myself - it doesn't matter how old they are if they are attacking you you have every right to defend yourself - just don't go over the top. When dealing with a group attack, i think its best to do something they are not expecting - so breaking the expected cycle of action reaction, I think shouting would be a good option first as if they're young they won't be able to shout as loud (also get some attention), if they continue threaten violence, and then if they still continue carry out threat (a quick kick up the bum for them).

actually, its easier said than done. its difficult to say what to do, because they were in a group, and could have really attacked you.

Maybe you could have shouted at them really loudly the minute someone started kicking you, and tried to intimidate them.

Can I ask, orange gnome, are you male or female? Your name doesn't give an indication.

I would defend myself too.  You might think that you'd be laughed at if you ever had to talk to the police, but girl gangs, even when they're pre-teen are a serious problem in some places.  If you'd been an elderly man or woman you could have been hurt and seriously shaken up. 

I've been taunted by some stupid little kids a few times, I tend to get shouts of 'filthy f***ing goth' and so on because I have pink streaks in my hair.  But I either ignore them or turn round and just shout something rather offensive.  I'm afraid I'd rather lower myself to their level than just take it.  That fact that i know their parents is obviously very helpful too ;)

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Morrisonker, I know yoir pain being a fellow Goth. My gf and I were intimidated by a group of 5 late teens, there was no way out and they were not giving up so I headbutted the main one, as he went down I right hooked his mate on the left, he went down, my gf then hit the one behind on the nose with a full can of cider and stopped him, the other 2 ran off. Amazing, I never knew I had it in me. GOTHS 5 CHAVS 0. By coincedence the police were nearby, believed us and told them to go home

Perhaps not quite the same, but I had a similar experience on a bus a couple of years ago when a group of youths (about 10 or 11 in age) were generally being the abusive chavs that are the norm in Tamworth. They started on a guy, who promptly got off the bus, and then started throwing chewing gum at others, including me. I game them a chance to stop but didn't, so jumped up, turned around and bellowed at the absolutely top of my voice, seething with hatred. I swore, which embarrassed me a little in front of all the old ladies, but I just screamed... "Who the **** did that?!" over and over, then grabbed one by the neck (I hope I hurt him!) and said "It was you, it was you wunnit?", at which point they all went very quiet. Upon getting off the bus another passenger came over and gave me a pat on the back! Liberty lives on in South Staffordshire...
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Thanks everyone, I do have to agree that it easier said than done! Since it happened I have come up with various things I could have done. At the time I was just so amazed that these awful children were so fearless!!
Dark Angel of course you can ask! I am female.

It may be completely inappropriate for the situation as of course I wasn't there, but I would try to use humour to diffuse it with kids this young. I would probably have said something like "isn't it past your bedtime?" with a smile on my face and tried to get into a conversation with them to stop the kicking. As I said, this may not have worked in this particular situation, it's difficult to comment on their demeanour. Having said that, if they'd continued with the kicking, I'd have been tempted to knock ten bells out of the ringleader. Tough one and I can understand why you're feeling frustrated and humiliated... I work in a shop and it's the same when a customer starts personally laying into me for something that isn't my fault and I can't answer back in the way that I want to!!!  

orange-gnome, that's a terrible story and I really feel for you. The kids said you couldn't touch them because you would get in trouble and that's the whole point. All kids today know that and I've heard the phrase used over and over by them. That's why they can do what the hell they want, because there's absolutely nothing you can do about it unless you want to get yourself in trouble. If you hurt a kid in the process of defending yourself, I really can't see that the law would be on your side. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I can't see it.

 

I would found the nearest wall and put my back to it, so nobody can get behind me, grabbed the nearest thing I could find, stick or brick/stone etc. and begged them to come one at a time.

As I have learnt through painful expeience, as both a giver and a receiver, the simplest option is to evade the situation is the first place.

Why take a pill to cure a headache, when you can avoid having the headache in the first place?

I know how you feel as I was bullied as a child my whole way through school untill junior high. I learned that confidence is the best defence anyone has. Even if you have to muster all of your strength to fake it the first few times after a while it will become natural and feed on itself. Walk tall and proud and look alert. Be authoritative and assertive. Convey strength and pride. Head up, shoulders back, and walk with purpose. I am a small person with no genuine confidence to speak of but I can fake it well enough that the few people who have the courage to get to know me have told me that I scared the heck  out of them. These people have been well worth befriending and no one messes with me anymore. I have been told also that all that confidence is very sexy too.

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