When Women Successfully Diet.

[dave50]

I have observed this and so has my wife many times. When a woman goes on a diet and successfully loses weight and looks fantastic, she will invariably get comments from other overweight women around them, whether it be friends, colleagues or even family. They will say either, 'don't loose any more weight you will be too skinny, or 'I think you have lost a bit too much'. Of course it is just jealousy because they haven't the will power or are too lazy, so they don't want others to succeed. Why can't they just say "well done, i wish I could do it"?

[bednobs]

simply because sometimes it's true - they do look too skinny or unhealthy

[ummmm]

When I lost loads of weight it was the men that made comments like that. Not the women.

[daffy654]

This is not something I have observed, you must hang around some nasty women.

[cazzz1975]

not everyone looks fantastic when they lose weight, I lost a lot of weight over the last year, I looked ill not fantastic and i even had a (normal sized) friend wince at me when she saw me

[naomi24]

I've been told I'm too thin by overweight friends. I'm not.

[Connemmara]

I would definitely say "well done" on the loss of your weight - "wish I could do it". Dave never suggest what women "think" - you need to be a woman to do that!

[pixie373]

I've noticed that too, dave50. Maybe because losing weight quickly can take some getting used to for other people. Someone at our work lost three stone fairly quickly. She looked and felt (she said) great. There were some who said she looked ill. She wasn't underweight at all and i found that strange.

[pixie373]

I've been called"skinny" by overweight friends, too. I'm not.

[mccfluff]

anyone smaller than me is skinny :-)

[jd_1984]

Just to be devils advocate. Sometimes women (and some men) do go too far and almost lose what was attractive about them in the first place. It can also make you appear older, particularly if you lose weight from your face.
Skinny isnt healthy or sexy in my opinion.

[Octavius]

"I've been called"skinny" by overweight friends, too. I'm not."

Yes, but to them you are skinny, as to you they are overweight.

[woofgang]

I think that unless someone really looks ill (eg pallor, dark circles under eyes etcet,) then its the height of bad manners to comment adversely on someone's appearance. If you think they look ill then you ask how they are or how they are feeling. If someone asks for an honest opinion about how they look, then i would give it if I was sure they really wanted to hear it. If someone had a label sticking out or a wardrobe malfunction then I would mention it discretely. If someone was celebrating having lost weigh then even though i am traditionally built, I would congratulate them. The only other unsolicited comments I would make on someones appearance would be to compliment them. That's just good manners.

[ummmm]

I always found it odd that people feel they can comment on your weight if you're thin but it's bad manners if you're fat.

[pixie373]

Octavius, I'm not skinny, as i am not underweight. They are overweight in that they weigh more than they should for their height. BMI will indicate whether you are actually under or overweight. It's not just an opinion

[pixie373]

...and you're right, ummm. I don't make references to their weight, unless they are talking about one of their diets.

[ummmm]

BMI is not accurate. My OH is considered overweight according to his BMI...he's far from it.

[Octavius]

No, its not just opinion, its largely perception.

I am skinny compared to Johnny Vegas, but I'm not underweight. I'm fat compared to Mo Farah, but I'm not overweight.

[pixie373]

You mean "skinnier" ? Being slimmer than someone obese, for example, doesn't make you "skinny". There are optimum weight ranges. If you are within them, you aren't skinny or overweight.

[friedgreentomato]

Sometimes it is genuine concern!

[ummmm]

Skinny might be the wrong word.