It's Really Hard To Trust Don't Want To Be Made A Fool Of

[soconfused]

Hello , I'm older than my bf we have been dating 2 and a half years now but I got this niggly trust problem that's just won't go away. It's start from a certain social network site where girls were tagging him and pics and writing on his wall I got jealous we argued so he deleted his account. Then he decides to go on twitter and I found some flirty banter with other girls I the end he made his account protected so I couldn't see what he wrote anymore. I've had past relationships where my bfs have cheated so this have effected me trusting people but always had the instinct that they were cheating. I can't ignore this instinct but he says if we got no trust we can't be together. ??? Dunno how I can overcome this .....

[woofgang]

easy. dump him.

[soconfused]

Ha ha ... But what if it's me being paranoid and a lose a good man :(

[woofgang]

you know he's making you unhappy right?

[Sqad]

\\\\ I've had past relationships where my bfs have cheated so this have effected me trusting people but always had the instinct that they were cheating.\\\

Your instincts were correct, they probably were.....it is a fact of life.

\\\\Dunno how I can overcome this ....\\\\

You can't.....you will have to learn to live with it.

Yes, you could "dump him" but then could you easily replace him?

[soconfused]

No he treats me like a queen ... Maybe it's the age thing

[Old_Geezer]

Whilst it is possible it may be you that has an issue, a relationship is still about compromise with your partner's need, and this doesn't seem to be happening. There are loads of good men out there. You could both try dicussing, listening, understanding, and coming up with a solution. nowt wrong with him being in contact with folk of either gender, but if he is aware that the flirting is causing you issues then perhaps he could gradually tail that stuff off ? Otherwise the choice whether to cut & go or not, is yours.

[ummmm]

What's the age difference?

If my partner didn't trust me I'd leave him.

[soconfused]

He's 24 I'm 31

[ummmm]

O_G...problem is with insecure people that they often see an innocent exchange of words as flirting.

[soconfused]

He's says he'll delete his account if it makes me happy but I dun wanna b the psycho paranoid girlfriend

[ummmm]

That's not a big age gap.

If he's not up to anything you'll drive him away. He's a grown up and should be able to use social media without being accused of cheating, or the suggestion that he might cheat.

Stay around on this site and you'll see lots of flirting between users....all, in my opinion, harmless fun.

[soconfused]

Exactly he says he trusts me ... And dosent check up on me

[ummmm]

With your previous cheating partners were they ever suspicious of what you got up to, who you spoke to, etc.?

[soconfused]

It's hard to remember .... Sometimes I think it's like cause they wet cheating they accused me

[soconfused]

* were sorry

[ummmm]

In my experience that's what cheaters do. Because they're doing it they get paranoid that you're doing it. Your boyfriend isn't doing that so give him a chance and treat him as if he has the same mindset as you.

[soconfused]

Well I've come to the conclusion if he is gonna do it nothing I can do about it .... I could b ruining a relationship over nothing .... Whatever's meant to be will be :)

[Sqad]

soconfused........very sensible, very practical and in my opinion....the right decision.

[Sqad]

soconfused......very sensible very practical and in my opinion the correct decision.

[Sqad]

soconfused......very sensible very practical and in my opinion the correct decision.