Merry Xmas?

[Scarlett]

This Christmas has made me vow not to have another like it. I was on my own the whole time (from Christmas eve 4pm to now) except for a few hours on Christmas day when I went to a friend's house. She has a family and I do feel a bit like I am encroaching on their family day. All my friends have unspoken laws where they have to do family obligation stuff. I'm disabled (can't walk or drive) so am stuck unless a car comes to me. My parents live 5 hours away and sisters in another country. There are quite a lot of things set up for old people who are alone over Christmas, but I'm only 45. This got me thinking- did everyone have a nice Christmas with family, or are there others like me out there? Need to get this in perspective! And yes, I do know things could be worse. I just woke up feeling rather upset about it today.

[janbee]

Scarlett, you were not the only one who had a horrible Christmas . I can't think of a worse Christmas to have than one spent with a family. As the saying goes... "did you have a happy Christmas or did you spend it with your family"? MANY MANY MANY people are on their own at this time of year, some through choice, some through circumstance. Fear not Scarlett, you are not alone. Never never feel that. You can come on here and chat to all sorts of people all year round. We're a bit like the old Windmill Theatre in London "we never close". The AB friends and family are right at the end of your fingertips. By the way, here's to a very happy and healthy 2015. xx

[pastafreak]

I was also dreading Christmas this year. Its usually just myself and lil pasta...but she decided to go to warmer climes. Can't say that I blame her,and I can't expect her to always spend it with her old mum. But,I was not looking forward to it. Then a workmate who is newly on her own invited me over.I went,and had a good time in spite of feeling somewhat weepy and sorry for myself beforehand. The food was not what I normally eat,but I know my friend...who is on a VERY tight budget...made a huge effort,and I appreciated that. Besides,it was more about the company than any thing else. If I'd not been there,I'd have poked my nose in here...there is always someone about.
I'm a good few years older than you,and I would not got to any event set up for 'oldies'...I don't want to be separated by age.

[Butterbun]

Scarlett, I feel quite sad reading your post because you missed an opportunity to come on here and chat to other folk who were also on their own. They would have cheered you up a bit and you would realise that you are not on your own when you have AB friends to talk to. Several people here are also unable to leave their houses for different reasons and they would have been happy to have your company. Please visit more often. I hope you will have a better time of it in 2015. Here's a hug for you. x

[ummmm]

Luckily I have a great family and great in-laws and there are loads of us so I don't think I'll ever be alone at Christmas.

I like being alone but that's through choice.

[Baldric]

Just me and 2 dogs from midday Tues. 'til 4 pm yesterday, OH away with family, my fault, didn't book Kennels early enough so had to dogsit, it was ok, looked in here everyday, always someone about.
Might do it again, but don't tell OH!

[whirlyhurly]

Scarlet, I also find Christmas the most depressing time of year. What with all this false jolliness and hype. Just bear in mind December 25th is after all just another day. Some of us would rather be alone, than feel lonely in a crowded room.

[Old_Geezer]

I had a fairly subdued Christmas but did visit my siblings. But I can envisage a Christmas where I was on my own though. I think the secret is to anticipate, plan ahead, and be happy with one's own company. If you haven't your entertainment / interests ready, be they books, TV, music, PC / Net, other hobby, food, drink, whatever; then you are liable to sit there just feeling sorry for your situation and building up a depression. Keep busy with things you enjoy and you'll have a great time.

[BlackadderV]

I think that there are quite few of us who have no family left and are on our own. I don't view Xmas as any different to any other day, apart from the inconvenience that there is no public transport.

[Mamyalynne]

Scarlett, I am older than you (61) been a widow si and a half years - have two daughters both married with children. For the few years after their Dad died they made a huge effort to make sure I wasn't alone and came to me as always , I soon realised that 'the'day was the one the children particularly wanted at home with their toys and still in PJs etc.


Now I go to one or the other on Boxing day, so apart from that day for 4 hours I have been home alone, and just indulged myself.

We all do what is right for us, and as said above - AB is always here for a natter.


I wish you a very happy 2015 and maybe you can come up with a plan in time for next year, something that suits you.

Take care.x

[Mamyalynne]

^ six and a half years - keys sticking

[glenbar]

I can identify with most on here. Not alone, but family rifts cause problems and every year when I see the Christmas cards appear in the shops in August I go into a depression as I know what is coming. I cant get people to see that bearing resentments cure nothing and it will go on and on for ever. I always wish I could simply disappear for December. Happy New Year to everyone.

[petal54]

all best wishes for new year,xmas here is not helped for me by the short days which does nothing for my depression,I do have family but can still feel isolated,but the cat does help by bossing me about!.all the best

[237SJ]

I agree with OG. I have only ever had one christmas on my own (when I first left home and had to work either side of Christmas Day) so you have to get into the correct mindset whereby you are determined to do your own thing and enjoy Christmas in your own way.

[Wak]

Scarlet, maybe if you indicated in which area you live then, just maybe, another ABer in the same area and position as yourself could make contact and be company for you?
Just a thought!