Unable to smile when nervous

[white_heart]

Help! When I am nervous or feeling self consious, I am totally unable to smile. When I try, the muscles around my mouth start shaking and eventually 'collapse' and people look at me quiziccally. This is a very frustrating problem, as I so want to smile, but instead come across as sullen and unfriendly or just rather odd. Any ideas?

[rja211077]

therapy

[mikewith]

This does seem to be worthy of more than a flip one-word response --- but maybe also of more than the thoughts of an unqualified lay person! Still, I imagine looking at the causes of your nervousness and self consciousness might be a start?

[whiskygalore]

Might be symptoms of a panic attack - go see your doctor, at the very least she or he can recommend a book or group to go to.

[white_heart]

I really don't want to see my docotor, no offense to any on the site, but nine times out of ten GP's are absolutely useless at investigating and dealing with underlying causes of complaints. The thing is, apart from this I am a fully functioning, socially capable human being. I have no problem getting on with people and woould go so far as to say I was generally well liked. But it seems to be getting more and mlre extreme and I want to nip it in the bud. I suppose I was hoping someone else would say 'I have exactly the same problem' and make me feel better!

[rekstout]

I would firstly reiterate whiskygalore's suggestion that your GP is the first person to speak to - even if you simply ask for some contact details for more suitable people. It may have a physical cause - a disorder in your sympathetic nervous system - just like some people get very sweaty when nervous and this can be checked.

The chances are you are just caught in a cycle where you can't smile beacuse you are nervous and you are nervous because you are concious of not smiling. This can be broken through therapy/self-help or medication.

I know from experience about this as I had similar cyclic problems when I couldn't sleep for about six months - I would stay up all night worrying about not sleeping (no other reason) - I went to my GP several times about it but eventually was referred to a specialist who helped me break that cycle without sleeping pills or anything like that and I have been fine ever since.

If you are embarrassed to go to your GP then you can always opt for a private consultation or call NHS direct for advice/contacts.

[rekstout]

I forgot to add - if you want to smile try starting by saying words beginning with "S" so that you mouth is already in the correct position -then you are halfway there. Also, try remebering funny events, jokes or moments when you want to smile - this will help you smile and distract you from your nervousness

[alisonbayne]

I know you don't want to see your GP, but you could be fortunate and it might be that he/she would be able to help you find a solution. It's maybe worth making an appointment in spite of your negative feelings - what have you got to lose? At least you will have tried the mainstream medical avenue and if you get no joy, head in a different direction - self-help, holistic stuff etc.

[lorini]

white_heart...your message was written 2 years ago, are you still searching for an answer to your queston? Please reply if you are? Or if you've found help...