Not maudlin at all. Death comes to us all, often preceded by old age, sometimes by decrepitude.
Like many, when I'm really low - and it's not just being low, but knowing that various ailments are NOT going to get better with time! - then lying down and going to sleep forever does seem like a good option...
But, and it's the only really important but... My death is scarcely relevant to me, but it is hugely relevant to my partner. Of course she would survive, of course she would cope, and so on, but she would be utterly devastated by our being separated by death, after nearly half-a-century together.
And given our differing ailments, my death is more likely than hers. This is a cause of gut-wrenching sorrow to me, of blinding hot tears of regret - but not for me.
My only wish is that I could be the second one to die, to save her the pain.
Buenchico, I do wonder about your own plans. You seem to contemplate your own end so easily; I wish I could do the same.
BB