Hi
I hope I can help you. I'm 52 and at the beginning of my menopause. During the perimenopause a year or so ago I was miserable with the same symptoms you describe, although with fearful hot flushes, particularly at night. Then to cap it all I had to have a breast op after a routine mammogram resulted in a call-back to see a specialist.
Although everything was OK I decided not to take the offered HRT and tempt fate any more than I had to.
I did a lot of research and started taking Menoherbs 2 from Victoria Health in conjunction with Isovon. It took a month or two, but after that the hot flushes more or less stopped as did the other symptoms.
You can only get Menoherbs 2 at Victoria Health but I shopped around for the Isovon tablets and found discount vitamins and herbs on the web were the cheapest. I take two tablets of the Menoherbs 2 a day and started off with one Isovon as well. I was able to cut the Isovon down to one every other day after a while.
Not sure these will help you lose weight, but they will make you feel better. Good luck.