Home Alone

[josaphine32]

I am so bored my daughter has gone to her dads for the weekend, and i feel so fed up......anyone got any ideas to what i can do within the house!!!! i need to keep ocupied as i will sit and cry otherwise and please dont say ironing my mum said that!

[mydogsandme]

josaphine- not in the same position as you but when my kids were younger my hubby would take them abroad for a week in the summer as I don't like the heat and they enjoy beachy holidays in Spain. In the Summer it's easier to find things to do I think but I'd save up things I'd been meaning to do- part of them for the house and part for me. I'd do little painting jobs round the house, do the gardening, sorting out rooms and so on and then things for me like go into town and treat myself to dinner, order a take-away and a film that no-one else at home would want to watch, reminisce looking through old videos and playing old records, visit my mum and dad and let them cook me dinner without having to rush back home for anyone! I think we get so used to looking after others it takes a while to relax and just be ourselves- it comes with practice! Think of the time you have alone as special and important and then you'll look forward to it instead of hating it. Good luck.

[mydogsandme]

sorry if this is a double post but not sure if my last one sent- grrr how annoying! Josaphine- not quite your situation but when my kids were younger my hubby used to take them on holiday without me for a week as I don't like hot beachy holidays in Spain. My advice would be to try to see the time alone as special and important to you and then you'll enjoy it instead of hating it. I would spend part of the time doing things around the house that I wouldn't get time for but only things I'd enjoy!- such as small painting jobs and planting flowers etc and then time time for me such as going into town and treating myself to lunch, having a takeaway, watching a video no-one else would enjoy, reminiscing with old videos and playing old records, going to my mums and having her cook dinner for me!. Don't feel guilty about doing things you enjoy, the more you do it the easier it gets. Enjoy....

[spacechimp]

If someone is depressed I have every reason to tell them to lighten up.

[shaneystar2]

Space chimp...you are like an irritating itch that won't go away.
If someone is depressed telling them to "lighten up " is no help whatsoever.If you have ever seriously been depressed you would know this. Depression is an illness.And the more down that you feel the worse it can get until you have to seek professional help.I doubt very much that josaphine and minxie are clinically depressed..just sad and bored because their children are not around at certain times.If you have nothing positive to offer to them why bother to join a thread just make stupid remarks that are no help whatsoever.
And stop following me round AB like a lost child..you are beginning to get on my nerves.

[noxlumos]

Wow Chimp, your nothing short of a ruddy genius! When I was suffering from depression etc I have no idea why I didn't just "lighten up" and save all of those Drs, Psychiatrists, Councellors and so forth from having to train for several years in order to treat me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for such refreshing advice, I think I'll just give the Samaritans a ring and suggest the next time someone suicidal comes on the phone, they simply say "lighten up", it'll make such a difference.

[spacechimp]

Wow Shaneystar, what an amazingly original simile: "itch that won't go away", that's a new one on me. How on earth do you come up with these incredibly original comparisons? Some day I may have to tap into your brainwaves and harness all of the incredible, not remotely clich�d analogies. Noxlumos, for depression I would recommend St. John's Wort (pronounced wurt); I've heard that it can work wonders.

If you have a problem with how rude and insensitive I'm being, I suggest you consider how you reply to questions yourself. Telling someone to "lighten up", when they have reacted harshly to another person's well intended suggestion, seems to me to be a perfectly reasonable thing to do. I was not saying lighten up to miraculously Minxie to heal any depression she might have; it was purely in objection to her aforementioned response.

[spacechimp]

Miraculously should have gone between "heal" and "any"

[shaneystar2]

"If you have a problem with how rude and insensitive I'm being, I suggest you consider how you reply to questions yourself."

I resent your accusations and hope that any answers I give people are helpful . How can I can be rude giving a crossword answer or just giving people info they are looking for.
I very rarely contribute much to this category any way.

I suggest you look back at your own posts and then we will see who is rude and insensitive.

If you want rude mate you can have it .... sod off and leave me alone.

[spacechimp]

You said I was an irritating itch. I see that as rude.

[Ward-Minter]

Not one to be argumentative of course, but i feel you may be being a little harsh on the space chimpanzee.

I think he was just being responsive to minxie, who even to me seemed a little edgy for no apparent reason.

Besides, josaphine probably has the kids back by now and reaching for the Hedex.

PS Josaphine are you a milf?

[josaphine32]

Soz but i must not be too much up to date...milf?? Thankfully my daughter is back now which is great to the degree that you know shes back cos every room is trashed.....bless her, Mr prize i tried to join the quiz web sight last night but still still waiting for the link but i am sure that will be intresting for me in the future, I thank you for that, It may be difficult for a guy or a female with out sibblings to understand exactly what it is like when you are put in this situation, i have become very close to my daughter although when she is away at her fathers i withdraw all contact its his time not mine... but also i am there on line if she needs me.i thank you all for you response...but like some ab users have said unless you have been there....its so hard for you to understand with no disrespect to anyone.

and i really do thank all of you

jo

x

[Ward-Minter]

MILF= Milan Institute for Latin Frogs.

[allotment10]

shaney- (dkeyse - spacechimp?)

[spacechimp]

I don't know what you're talking about allotment, but josaphine's problem being over seems a convenient time to stop arguing.

[allotment10]

don't worry about my problem spacechimp! think you should worry about yours!

[spacechimp]

And what exactly is my problem?

[noxlumos]

Hi chimp, I've been watching you post with interest and sometimes, like the rest of us, you have a very valid point and sometimes ( like the rest of us) you don't.

The thing is that when you've posted something that's clearly going to rile people then you have to expect them to have a go at you and it's all well and good saying "lighten up" the once, but you did labour the point a little and defend a really weak and quite ( unintentionally) rude suggestion. To say to someone who is very depressed to lighten up is to denegrate the way they feel, and to push the matter is exceptionally rude, that's why you've got mauled.I mentioned your age to try to prevent that happening and then you waded in again, which is fine if you don't mind people retaliating, but this is not really that type of thread, it's not a debate. Someone is hurting for reasons that are outside of your realm of experience and they needed constructive suggestions not someone telling them that in some way they were responsible for the way they felt.St johns wort needs to be taken with care as there are considerable contra-indications by the way, and you might be happy to know that I need to take no medication for depression or have use for a counsellor, psychiatrist or any other mental healthcare profesional now, I have my own methods of dealing with depression when it occurs, but those are very specific to my case so would not be of help or interest here.

I don't think you have a problem, I think you merely have a lack of life experience, which will improve everyday.

[allotment10]

spacechimp - (hmm) yes, what exactly is your problem ??

[Ward-Minter]

noxy dear sir, again I find myself defending this man.

1) Lighten up was in response to a response to me methinks.

2) Nobody ever said they were depressed. Poor young josaphine was just feeling a little sorry for herself, not exactly depressed.

3) Playing devils advocate, "lighten up" (if said in context) may be a good therapy. I have from a very good source (fully qualified to say it!) that "Get a grip therapy" i.e lighten up, can be excellent.

[spacechimp]

Well, this has all been very interesting. :)