Flowers

[4getmenot]

When people put flowers on peoples grave it is a lovely thought but when people put them at a crash site I myself find it a bit weird. Does anybody else think it is??

[4getmenot]

When people die you're supposed to remember their life not put a bunch of flowers where it ended. I have lots of past friends who have died in crashes and would never want to go and see the site where they died, when I see some now it makes me very sad. and also surely it makes it even an even more dangerous road when people are distracted looking at them. Why cant people send these to the family, I'm sure they appreciate the thought more and they'd know that people cared for their loved ones. I only agree when it is a case where you dont know where the family live, like Holly and Jess (god rest their souls), but maybe the money spent on Diana's thousands of flowers could have gone to her charities rather than just waste away. I find saying goodbye to a loved one at a site that had nothing to do with their life very morbid.

[silly moo]

Yes , I do.
Especially when they don't even know the person who died.
I also think that it could possibly be a danger to drivers as it can attract their attention from the road.

[Drusilla1S]

I can understand a person placing flowers on a friend/family members grave and taking a few moments to remember them, but the growing tendency to place flowers at the scene of accidents seems more like maudlin exhibitionism to me and typifies our 'look at me, I really really care' society.

[4getmenot]

Do you get what I mean though. My friend hung himself but I wouldnt place flowers by the bannisters.

[candybar]

it often isnt fair on residentst who live nearby these scenes. remember reading a story once about a lady who lived on the road of a crash and flowers were left right outside her house and she found it very upsetting yet did not want to offend the family by asking them to stop.

[jno]

you often see little shrines by the road on the continent. Sometimes they serve as reminders of traffic black spots. I don't find it any stranger than putting flowers on graves: either way, the person who's died isn't going to know about it, it's for the comfort of those who are remembering them.

[Coobeastie]

Just recently in our town an oap was knocked down and before the afternoon was out people had put flowers down. Turns out the person didn't even die.

I'm with you I can't see why people feel the need to commemorate the location where the person died.

[Calvesy]

People are a bit soft, but a genuine expression of grief may seem inappropriate to someone else with the same feelings. There's one religion even uses a scene of death as their logo. Gross. Mass hysteria and peer pressure as well as ostentation creep into the motive, and what was intended to be a display of empathy and compassion turns into an eyesore, hazard and cringe.

[Toureman]

Yes it is weird, after a few weeks it's just an eyesore.

[Hard@it]

I am neither for or against it but we had flowers for a crash where two people were killed and now there is a plaque on the wall, with flowers still being put there. This is on a busy road and I do not even know if Council permission was given for this plaque as it is in sculpted stone and built into the wall. Where will it end will we have every second street with these ?

[keithlbw]

we should not put flowers at the roadside where someone has died.Can you imagime the chaos in hospitals if people left flowers at the bedside of everyone that had died!

[4getmenot]

keithlbw that is a great way of putting it, you are exactly right. Flowers are for the grave, or just use the money for a worthwhile cause and give it to charity.

[4getmenot]

There is a road I know that has 3 pictures in numerous spots where teenagers have died and plaques and it makes me very nervous and wary of the road.

[Bohne]

I don't find that weird at all.
The person you are remembering is gone, what does it matter, where you put the flowers.

Some people have a little altar/shrine for lost ones...

[fideldyfee]

I said to my mum the other day that if i die in a crash dont bother putting flowers down, it just upsets people driving past. There is a bit near me where a boy was killed 2 years ago and there are still flowers and football tops and scarfs getting put down.

[Jay70]

It does have the effect of being a little wake up call though. Most cars these days are so refined it's easy to go over the speed limit or not be in touch with how cold it is outside. It certainly reminds me of my and others mortality and makes me more conscious of the possible outcome of not keeping my mind on the road.

[Hard@it]

Keithlbw - I have to agree with you we would be in a fine mess if people did do that. Part of the problem is people emulating that shown at times on the TV

[andy-hughes]

I can fully appreciate the concept of putting flowers on the grave of a loved one, but the notion of flowers at a death spot of someone I didn;t even know is a stretch too far for me.

As far as I can recall, this started with the death of Princess Diana, at least in such vast numbers, and I do find the idea of 'national mourning' to be rather bizarre.

[4getmenot]

In the case of holly and Jess surely it just showed it touched the hearts of the nation and maybe with Di too, and it was probably nice for the family to know that. But I mean when someone dies in a crash why would you want to put flowers where their life ended if you can take them to their family so they know you care.

[WendyS]

I think it's partly because people feel helpless to do anything else of a more practical nature to change the situation and making a gesture of any kind helps them to identify with what has happened. I personally feel that flowers (apart from immediate family in such situations) are better reserved fo the living *especially those who are lonely or neglected) and to whom they would give more pleasure.