M E or chronic fatigue syndrome

[CLOWN TICKLE]

My wife is now seemingly suffering with this, any advice on how to deal with it would be of help, its with all the nursing she has had to do

[gessoo]

My advice would be to rest, rest, rest and rest and not to feel guilty about it. Hopefully, she has been 'signed off'. Apparently female nurses and teachers are the most likely people to get MS (as told to me by my GP). It's a horrible illness and the worse thing is it makes you feel guilty because you can't do anything. I ignored it for a long time unfortunately as I had a young child at the time and a very bad doctor.

The good news is, things can and do get better. She will have to 'listen' to what her body tells her to do.

Best wishes to her and to your family. It's nice she has a genuinely careing husband!

[caz21]

You are usually succeptible to ME when you have a weakened immune system (a lot of people tend to get it after Galandular Fever) I would suggest taking lots of vitamins and minerals to build it back up, also light exercise (ten min stroll once every two days) it would depend how bad your wife suffers from it, but if she can barely get out of bed, it is best to rest and NOT to do too much thinking you need to push yourself as it makes it worse! Its a terrible thing to suffer from and a lot of people including doctors do not recognise it as an illness (if your doctor doesn't i would suggest swapping to one that does!) It used to be called Yuppie Flu because people thought it was laziness or being idle! It most definiteley is not though! Alternative therapies are useful for some sufferers! It tends to vary between sufferers as to the length of time it lasts some 6 months some years! I hope your wife gets better soon! xx

[andy-hughes]

Sound advice here. My wife has suffered from CFS for four years now, and she has gone from being virtually bedridden to being able to work part-time.

The worst thing is the sufferer's feelings of guit and inadequacy, especially as it usually affects people who have have led busy fullfilled lives, and feel useless and in the way.

You must constantly reassure your wife that her condition will improve in time, and she must learn to adapt to her 'new' life - sepcially not over-riding her body's need for rest and quiet. She is ill, not idle, or uselss, and she will need to reminded of this on an almost daily basis.

She must enjoy her medium and good days, and workm around the 'rest' days and try to accept that this is a genuine illness and must be approached as such.

Hope you are OK - remember to look after yourself as well!

[Hmmmmmm]

Both my wife and I have suffered with ME. To echo what's been said, rest is good, but so is gentle and regular activity to keep you mobile and to exercise your muscles (but definitely not violent exercise of any kind). The other thing we found was that planning is essential, if you have something like a family party that you want to go to, rest lots first and just accept that the few days after it are wiped out. Eating well, no smoking, all the normal health messages are doubly important. Relaxation techniques help some people, we found TM was useful. I really hope that your wife's health improves, it's a horrible condition and my thoughts are with both of you. One final word, it's important that you take care of yourself too!

[Aprilis]

I too suffer from M.E.

Your wife needs to be reassured that she should not feel guilty about being less able to do things than she was.

What my biggest gripe is about M.E. is that it is not the sufferer who needs to be told they are not idle, lazy, useless etc. They already know that! It is other people who don't understand or accept M.E. who need telling that!!

Without support and understanding, M.E. is very isolating. Please continue to support and understand your wife CLOWN as that is the most important thing of all and will be the biggest help to her.

Have a look at sites such as www.afme.org.uk (Action for M.E.) or www.meassociation.org.uk .Also there's www.brainfog.org for an online and offline support community and a few laughs.

Best wishes to you and Mrs Clowntickle,

Aprilis x

[joko]

i suspect it may not be real ME. judging by your last post about your mother in law dying, could it be that she is depressed or grieving and things are just getting too much for her?

i know depression can mimic symptoms of other illnesses

[CLOWN TICKLE]

certainly part of it but its been going on for ages

[Aprilis]

It's a possiblity joko. M.E. and depression can present with many of the same symptoms. I was treated for depression when I first went to my doc about M.E.

Turns out that I was depressed as the medication made a big difference. But I still have M.E. as the antidepressants didn't make any difference at all to the main M.E. symptoms.

I have read on other M.E. related sites that depression should be ruled out before a firm M.E. diagnosis is given.

CLOWN I just read somewhere that you have type 2 diabetes. I have recently been diagnosed with that too. What with ME, depression and diabetes I now have no room in my life for any other conditions, lol!

[gessoo]

Actually antidepressants did help me as well to get over a lot of the symptoms - but not the extreme tiredness or the problems with painful and twitching muscles. I kept going to the doctor with different symptoms and he had me down as a hypochondriac. He never even bothered to try and see the overall picture. There were days when I couldn't walk because of the pain and weakness. I was frightened and felt so ill and that wretched doctor made it much worse!