I know it's not a question, but...

[Champagne]

After a whole series of emotional dramas (all caused by my boyfriend), I have finally left him this morning. No goodbye, no explanation, I've just packed a bag and left. He hasn't realised yet because he passed out in bed after strolling in at 6am.

I'm feeling really strong and confident about this move, but obviously still very upset that it has come to this as he's a really lovely bloke when he's not being a self-destructive pillock! Coupled with the fact that I love him very much.

It's going to be a tough Christmas. :'o(

[redcrx]

thats a very major step to take but it sounds as if youve thought long and hard about it. I hope you have lots of friends around you who will help you get through it.
Christmas will be what you make it, get the girls out for a few drinks and a gossip if you can but take time for yourself too.
Good luck!

[Eve]

Well done hon, must have been terribly hard but you've given yourself possibly the best Christmas present ever, the gift of taking care of yourself.

It might be hard, I know, I've been there, but it's a very brave and positive thing you've done and hopefully things will only get better and you'll find someone who treats you right and as special as you deserve to be.

Christmas is what you make it hon, celebrate your release from things which have been hurting you and all the good things that lie ahead, get out there and make the most of it :)

xxx

[nat_84]

Hope we're not Sims here Champers....;o)

Awww i'm sure it's for the best in the long run, not many people would put up with their fella strolling in - presumably drunk? at 6am!

My mum put up with ridiculous behaviour from my dad for about 23 years - but about a year or two ago she found in it her to give him the boot - even though she still loves him, cares for him and worries sick about him! But its the best thing she's ever done, not only for herself but for me and my brother.

Christmas will hopefully take your mind off things, have a lovely time and enjoy the comforts of being around your family and friends.

xxxxxxx

[Champagne]

Hi Nat, I wish I was talking about the Sim world!!!

Actually it's a series of problems which have all piled up and I just can't take anymore. I feel exhausted to be honest and am fighting back now. I've been feeling very insecure and paranoid about his antics and it's reflected in me doing things like checking his mobile phone, which I'm really disgusted at myself for stooping so low.

So far we've had:-

- being caught french kissing his Irish cousin
- letting another cousin I've never met (supposedly like a sister to him) sleep in my bed and then me finding around 7/8 photos of her on his mobile in fully clothed, but sexy poses (he deleted these soon after)
- constant correspondence with some woman called Shelley
- promises to sort his drug problem
- promises to sort his drink problem
- promises to stop flirting with other women

Oh well. Some things aren't meant to be I guess.

[China Doll]

Hey you,

I'm sorry to hear that Champers. I always figured from your pixels that you two were pretty solid. But at the end of the day, you have to do what's best for you.

You've always struck me as a strong and fiesty character (with an amazing amount of knowledge... you know what I mean... nudge, nudge, wink, wink) so I'm sure you'll be fine. This time next year you won't feel so upset... it's just a moment in time that will pass.

Right... head up, chin out, wonder bra on, drink in hand... time to go and out and enjoy christmas! Take care of yourself sparkly one xx

[nat_84]

What is it with his cousins?!?!!!!!??

By the sounds of it you've defintely made the right decision...and i think you know that too.

Regarding the drink and drugs - no matter how much you tell someone, unless they want to do it for themselves and are willing to put the effort into stopping - it will never end and they'll only drag you down emotionally.

So be strong and try and stay away.
xxx

[RATTER15]

Champagne, you done the right thing, well done, now you got to stick with your decision!! keep reminding yourself what he done, make sure you have everything you need or that he may prevent you from taking. Good luck, its hard, I done it myself 3 years ago. I am so happy now!!

[Champagne]

I know Nat! Why can't he pull in a pub like normal people? hahahaha!

Thanks for all your kind words. I need that right now. I need a great big virtual hug and lots of reassurance. xxx

[lilacben]

Hi Champagne I am sendig you big hugs over the internet. Sounds the best thing you could have done. Don't let him sweet talk you to going back to him, a leopard never changes their spots. You could try forever and he would still be the same. Think of yourself and the futher ahead to meet the right man for you,someone who will look after and consider you,not him first. Well done. take care Brenda xx

[jno]

that's tough, Champagne; you've got somewhere to go?

I dare say that the problems were caused by him, as you say; but do consider your own role in all this (not to beat yourself up, just to stop it happening again). Watch out for people with drink problems and drug problems, who needs them? And people who flirt and people who know Shelley, I guess. You must have seen something in him... but maybe you were also choosing to overlook other things that should have sounded alarm bells?

Sorry, don't want to sound too critical, it's not your fault, but do learn from it all... merry Chirstmas anyway, hope it all goes well.

[Champagne]

He oozes confidence, sex appeal and charm, jno, plus he treats me like a queen. I knew he was flirtacious but after witnessing a kiss I realised that it was obviously out of control. I would never usually give someone a 2nd chance after something like that but had some close friends who told me to let him prove himself because we were such a great couple in so many ways.

I will learn my lesson from this, but I will not allow myself to tarnish any future boyfriends with the same brush. I'm stronger than most people I know so I will be fine through all of this, and as far as possible remain emotionally and mentally balanced.

I'm staying with a friend until mid-January. He won't know where or who. But I do now have the task of finding myself a new home.

[PinkFizz]

Hi Champers.Im so sorry that it didn't work out - I know from your posts on here how much you love him but by the sounds of it you have made the right decision. Not many women would have put up with anything on that list,let alone the whole lot!

Chin up hun - you know where we all are if you need to talk.xxxxx

[jno]

yeah, he probably did treat you like a queen - I've heard tales about the time Prince Philip comes home too (no kidding)! Anyway, you've done the right thing, tough but true. I wish you all the best.

[wonderwoman1]

Hiya Champers.... you know in your heart you have done the right thing. It will be difficult but you will come to realise that you deserve so much better.

Take care of yourself and get that little black dress on and enjoy your Christmas.

Loads of love and hugs (((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))) xxxxx

[silverdaler]

Hi Champers,
I think if you read your own posts back as if you were someone else you will realise what a lucky escape you have had. this man is obviously a self-centred loser. He HAD to treat you like a queen occasionally or you would have gone sooner, but he deserves to be alone so that the on;y person he can make miserable over Christmas is himself !
If you find yourself weakening, just focus on the negative side of your relationship instead of the occasional nice act.

You will be fine !!!!
x x

[kate1976]

Aww Champers, don't get too down about it, you seem to have done the right thing. Take care and keep smiling! xxx

[Champagne]

Thanks everyone. xxx

I know I've done the right thing. I have left quietly, but did so in order to hurt him, as I know that it will annoy him no end not having closure.

I have a friend's gorgeous flat ALL to myself from tomorrow evening through to 2nd January. By 20th Jan I'll need to have found somewhere else to live. So at least I have time to at least enjoy the party season.

I can't promise not to ponder over everything from time to time, but I can promise that I will not weaken and go running back to him.

And silverdaler, you are right. I'm going to read back over this on Monday and I bet I'll have a whole different perspective on things! :o)

[BBWCHATT]

Champagne - you deserve better than that. Every day that passes it will get a tiny, tiny bit easier - until one day in the future - magically - it won't hurt at all!!!

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year
from an old lady in Chattanooga, Tennessee, USA

[B00]

Awww bless ya Ham, you've always struck me as the type of women not take any crap. So I'm proud you've taken this stand.

Good on ya girl :-)

Hope that despite this you have an ace Crimble chick

xxxxxx

[Champagne]

Thanks BOO. I'll have a great Christmas! :oD

Happy Christmas to you too. x