Things that make ya go D'oh.....

[Slooow_Jo]

I've just been sitting here wondering what is wrong with my windows media player....then realised its coz I turned the speakers down when I was on the phone *blush*

My neighbour told me the other day her washing machine was broke coz it was turning but not spinning, I asked her if she'd checked the filter n when she looked at me with a blank look I offered to take a look for her, As soon as I walked into her kitchen I seen the dozy bint had the spin speed option on 0.....I'm still trying to decide what to charge her for call out fee hahahahaha

[dot.hawkes]

when i was in Antigua i told my daughter that the moon looked just like the one over our own house. (she said it looked bigger tho)

[bednobs]

i once took my watch into the shop for a new battery and the assisstant said to me "madam, this is a wind up watch"

[Redbel]

my daughter had a letter to take the little one to the Doctors for the routine hearing test.....she said to me...mum who is GP....nuff said I think

[Eve]

I went into Leeds station and kept asking for a return to Leeds and got quite frustrated until it dawned on me why they kept asking where i was going.

My mum rang me on my landline the other day and asked me if I was at home bless her :)

[dot.hawkes]

did u hear about the scouser that went fishing off the Mersey Bar? (Bez's uncle it was) he sat there for hours and got not one bite, then all of a sudden he felt a pull on his line and struggled to reel his catch in, turned out to be a lantern from a Spanish Galleon, and guess what? It was still lit.

[Redbel]

Rofl......Dot.....he still has it.....and it's still lit.....lol

[Slooow_Jo]

For years I wouldn't put anything like butter/cheese next to the light in the fridge incase the heat made it bad *blush blush blush*

Funniest thing tho when I told my mum she said "yes thats right" hahaha

[spurslady]

My neighbour asked me the same question when she rang my housephone too Jenna the other day.

I also once upon a time pointed out to my mate that a sexy bus driver we both knew and had a major crush on had a car like the one driving past us. 'Oh she said can he drive?' She realised what she had said when I pi**ed myself laughing.

[dot.hawkes]

I wouldn't buy Shampoo for dry hair for years cos i didn't want dry hair i wanted normal hair so i bought the shampoo for that.

[Panic Button]

I once parked my car in a shopping centre car park. Unusual for me as at the time I lived close by, but I was just shopping on the way home from somewhere.

When I came out the shops I walked home and was horrified to find my car wasn't in the usual place. Took me a couple of minutes to remember it was in the shopping centre car park.

[Eve]

I was very concerned throughout my first ever driving lesson having just turned 17. It was in driving rain and couldn't see a thing out the back through the rear view mirror.

Was a fair way in before I realised I had the rear view mirror pointed at the sunroof!

You'll be pleased to hear that...

a) It was not on the road (empty private land); and

b) I still don't have a license 11 years later!

Another of my mums told her it was charity week at college, her reply, is that just today then!

[Hawkwalk]

I used to work in a shop that sold lawn mowers. I had a customer come back twice to replace a mower he said kept cutting out after about half an hour and would not re-start.

When he called to say the third mower had done the same thing I went to his house to visit him to find out that it had run out of petrol.

[JustSia]

A barmaid at our local, when asked for a lager top, served gentleman a lager top , it was a cap from a bottle. When asked 'what the hell', she responded she thought he needed to close his bottle. And no, it wasn't her first day either but she was blonde, God bless her.

[naz_nomad]

When I haven't put the pen on my Wacom down properly, then can't move the mouse pointer ... that's caught me out a few times.

[ummmm1]

I asked a barmaid for a pint of lager and a coke.....and she asked me how much coke I wanted in my lager!!!!

[Slooow_Jo]

ummmm as an ex barmaid myself I feel a need to slap the dozy bint around the head lol

I once asked for 2 pints n 2 blackcurrants n got 2 lagers n black which was bad enough but....lager n coke??? sorry but she deserves a slap to wake her up LOL

[JustSia]

Slooow_Jo, actually some have lager and coke, can't remember what it's called but apparently it's quite big on the continent. There is also WKD and lager. Both are quite sickening.