I would go and spank as many female bottoms as I can. If I commit an assault and get arrested, who cares?? I will then spank WPC's bottoms and opt for a female solicitor.
Am I a bad man?
(PS I would also set free any animal used for cosmetic testing, providing they will not disturb the present eco-system too much)
(PPS I would also buy a decent automatic weapon and hunt down known pedos, rapists and terrorists and kill them)
(PPPS, I would also, believe it or not, try heroin and/or crack. Just out of curiosity, then kill the dealer)
(PPPPS, do a few high profil bank jobs and give the money to various animal charities)
(PPPPPS, say goodbye to me m'am)