Using office toilets

[Priesty]

Due to getting up too late this morning, i am now in dire need of a number 2. Its a small office, so people will know if i'm gone for any length of time, and i'm one of only 3 men so if its not flushable or produces any odour it will be obvious. Does anyone else have an aversion to using office toilets? and should i deflect the embarrassment by claiming i'm going in there to masturbate?

[cazzz1975]

just do it, if they make a joke about masturbation say "does mastubation normally stink the toilet out?"

everyone plops, just ignore them, if they make fun just tell them they are jealous of you room clearing odours

[jno]

strike a match and it will remove the odour.

[mccfluff]

and set the fire alarm off, thus distracting everyone from what you were doing!

[Priesty]

Looks like i'm making a quick trip home before going to the pub. If only i could guarantee it was gonna be a one wiper, i could be in and out in 1 minute, but i'm not willing to take the risk.

[Shadow Man]

Would it not be possible to sneak in to the ladies lav, and when you leave your brown gift, blame it on one of the receptionist tarts or something?

[Skreecheeboy]

Just use the pub toilets if you're that embarassed. Either that or go after everyone leaves.

[wiggal]

I would say i know how you feel! But i get it worse! With my stomach, i have upset stomachs every afternoon and its not fun, but I dont get a choice of waiting til i get home! I go down to the ground floor and use the loos there as they are normally empty!!

[chappie]

Seriously, if you take a box of matches in with you, after you have done your......ahem.........big smelly job, strike three or four matches, blow them straight out and the burning sulphur will neutralise the odour.

It does work, and you need not worry about setting the fire alarms off as there wont be enough smoke.