depressing!!

[wiggal]

Hey all!

Ok, so I'm a 21 yr old lass who is one of the unlucky ones! Basically, (tries not to hide in shame) I'm a 34AA chest size and it gets me down!

When I was in my teens, I always dreamed of having a boob job, but at the sae time worried what my mum and sister would think as they are small too!

I then met a man who loves me very much and we have been together for 4.5 years, and to start with I always thought well if he loves me as I am I should be happy!

But these days its really starting to get me down again :( I can only dream of wearing pretty tops and bras, and literally live my life in vest tops with a padded bra underneath.

I'm just pretty deflated (literally!) and although I love the thought of a boob job, even to a size B or C, I just dont know!

Help!

[terambulan]

U r young and possibly not a mother yet. You will fill-out with motherhood so please don't mess with your body. Have a look at your mother; is she small/medium/large, or same with ur dad.....that's your gene pool and where you will be when you reach their age. So give yourself time!

If your bf truly loves you as u r, that's the relationship you want (is he Adonis). You dont want a lover only interested in boobs as he'll soon move onto others if that's his interest.

Clothes look best on a 'hanger' - the slimmer the better! (Kate Moss?)

[Ethel]

If you are of a slim build, you can dress very fashionably and look fab with your figure.

You can wear very pretty, skinny, skimpy tops.

A lot of men just don't like implants, and I must admit the ones I have seen do look horribly unnatural. But maybe I'm biased as the thought of having bags shoved under my flesh makes my skin crawl.

And a smaller chest does help to keep a youthful figure.

Try lots of different clothes on - things you've never considered before. Invest in some really good bras of different styles.

I have known girls like you to radically alter when they have children - although it's no reason to have a baby!

I've hated my nose all my life - and there is no disguising it. Horrid huge thing stuck in the middle of my face. But I'm sure if I had a nose job, I'd be fretting about something else - fat ankles and my big bum, probably.

You don't need a boob job - you need confidence and self esteem.

[Panic Button]

You posted a link once to a picture of yourself.

You look bloody gotgeous!

[Panic Button]

oops.

the T is by the R

[wiggal]

Hey terambulan

I'm not a mother yet, no.

My mum is a fair bit shorter then I am, and was 7.5 stone till she had my brother at 25, and as flat as a pancake!
My big sister is a 34B, and she is 7 years older then me, but mine stopped growing a long time ago, well they never really started! My mum has said that they arent gonna be getting any bigger!

My fella loves me as I am, but has also said that although he would prefer I didnt, if a boob job is what I really want, he will pay for it (he earns a shed load more money then I do lol!).

So its not what he wants, its what I want! To feel better in myself! I'm just so unsure!

I cant even buy 34aa bras that fit properly, some are even too big for me!

[Octavius]

As Ethek says, look at the plus points of being smaller. You can wear pretty tops that are backless/sideless/plunging withough having to wear a bra. You don't have to worry about them drooping to your knees in later life. It is a much chicer look - you only have to look through most fashion mags to realise that models do not go for the huge fake boob look (unless you are Jordan or Jodie Marsh (Dear God no).

Finally, you know that when a man talks to you, it is because of your pretty face, or lovely smile or great sparkle and he is not just simply interested in getting his hands on your boobs.

Breast size does not determine how your love life will turn out. It does not necessarily make you a more confident person. You are who you are and your breasts just tag along it's inconsequential really.

[wiggal]

Thanks for your replies :)

I unfortunately cant wear the nice plunging/ackless or sideless dresses and tops, because I literally have nothing!

I do know that alot of my insecuriteis about this came from when I was at school, and used to have names shouted out of bus windows at me by all the people at the local schools, and that caused me alot olot of problems.

Its pretty destroying when you 15 and have a bus load of people go by who yell names and point at you in the middle of the town centre when you are with friends, and everytime I met new friends they would find out my name and go 'Oh so you are Lucy Pancakes!'.

[wiggal]

Sorry to cut the last answer short, but just typing that, and being the first time I have ever said to anyone what I was called has ended up with me in tears!

[wiggal]

Panic Button,

Thank you :-)

xx

[123everton]

You should try listening to Billy Joel more!
You've got a man who loves for you are, and as you are.
Take a peek at Body and Soul you've found the holy grail!
Seriously you're reading a post off a man who's had plastic surgery (13 times) you're reading from someone who is minus 10 bones, 1 in each hand, 4 in each foot (I do have lovely toes though, and I hate feet LOL) be happy with who you are, I am.
Don't resent what the Lord has sent.

[Octavius]

Sorry to hear that, you seem to have confidence and esteem issues, but I still don't think a boob job will solve that.

Ok, this sounds a bit blokey but.....

You can make the body of a car look fantastic, but it doesn't make its perormance any better, so you need to get to the problems inside the engine to make it purr like a kitten or roar like a tiger.

This is the same with your psyche, fixing things on the outside doesn't always repair the innards.

[wiggal]

Octavius,

It makes complete sense to me!
It may be a bit blokey, and I may not be able to drive yet, but I love my cars, and although I loved my ford KA, when she packed up, no matter how gorgeous she is, I still have to sign the log book to hand her over to the garage! lol!

[pastafreak]

Several times you have said...and I would imagine..quite forcefully......"I just don't know!!"....I think THAT is your clue to what you should do. Nothing!!...at least not at this time. You are considering something that can have a huge impact on your life,it is major surgery,and there is no gauarantee that it will be the 'miracle cure' that you want/expect it to be. I would put the idea to one side for a while, then -if it still seems to be the only choice- research it thoroughly....various clinics,surgeons.....even their patients.....see what kind of work each surgeon does..whether it is 'natural' enough-feel the boobs if that helps-lol!....you have to live with it...and even tho it is for you -do give some thought to how your partner/lover feels. A BBC program a few weeks ago about breast surgery,found that most men much preferred natural.

[Ethel]

I'm trying desperately to think of that fabby singer who 10 years or so ago wore a very plunging dress to an awards ceremony. It was past her navel.

So looked stunning and very dramatic, and the fact that she is flat chested took nothing away from her femininity.

Wish I could think of her name!

[puss_boots]

'scuse me for interfering but I just had to say something about this. I have enough life experience to know that your worries about your body are very serious to you now. It makes my blood boil with all the media attention on TV and in the papers about how we all should look. Every time I watch day time TV they are always on about weight, shape, bums, boobs and it makes me mad. Our genetic make up is what we have and for the media to constantly tell us how we should look is very intimidating for young people. Please stop worrying about your breast size, it doesn't matter in the least, you seem to have a nice boyfriend who loves you for you, if your boyfriend only loved you for the size of your breast then I would say " ditch him now". Just one last coment, I have very ample breaste and I have been married to an ar*se whole in the past who had 18 affairs in 15 years, so the lesson is.......what more did he want.....well obviously more than ample boobs.

[Velvetee]

If it makes you that unhappy, then do something about it, have implants.

If you do, research your surgeon carefully, (better to go by recommendation). Also, bear in mind, they don't last forever and will need replacing every 10-15 years.

[ruby27]

wiggal

You have already received some brilliant answers and you probably know that breast enlargements have risks and that corny as it sounds, confidence and self assurance does come from within rather than from add ons such as surgery.

For women like me who feel cursed with large breasts, I long to be able to wear pretty strappy tops and when young hated that it felt like people talked to my chest rather than my face. If surgery had been cheap 25 years ago I would no doubt have had a reduction. But now many years later I realise whilst it may have solved one (or maybe 2 if I had both done) problems, I would still have had self doubts and anxieties plaguing me. And as I couldn't have had the whole of my body and my personality surgically enhanced, I was going to have to live with being less then what I would have wanted.

Sorry for the triteness but first of all try admiring yourself half as much as your partner does. Whilst name calling is hurtful and corrosive and very hard to overcome, do try and listen to the voices of admiration rather than the negative ones.

[Octavius]

Ethel has reminded, not the same one I am sure, but wiggal take the gorgeous Shakira famously it would seem, noted for her humble boob size. She had this to say�.

"Some days I would look at my reflection and see garbage, and I guess I was worried about the size of my breasts for a long time. But now I think I have finally reached an age where I have accepted myself for who I am."

That in itself should provide some tangible inspiration.

[daisycup]

I am 30 and 3 years ago I had implants. Nothing wrong with it and it's the best thing I've ever done in my opinion. I had no confidence, was dying to wear backlace tops, dresses... just to feel good about myself. I took a lot of time reading all about it... weighing up the pro's and con's. I found a great surgeon who talked me through it and advised me what size to go for. I was in between an A and B and now I'm a D. It suits my frame and they DO look natural. All my friends and family tell me that they wouldn't know I've had implants. With a good surgeon they won't look fake (stuck on buns). If you are really unhappy then just look into it but do think hard as they won't last forever. I have to go back after 5 years for just a check up - but my surgeon said that they can last up to 20 years... all depends on how your body takes to them.

After I had my operation I was home the next day and after a week I was back at work. I'd say the first 3 days are most uncomfortable but definitely not as painful as I thought. I would do it all again, no regrets.