He's gone...

[CAJ1]

My boyfriend has just left to go to Iraq, it was the hardest thing ever waving him off and now I can't stop crying so I need ideas to cheer me up and get me through the next three months!

[Mamyalynne]

Oh sweetheart how sad you must be. Try to pass the time with happy thoughts and perhaps compile a scrapbook sort of thing full of things to show him when he gets back.
If you have spare time on your hands maybe try a little charity work it will fulfill you.
We are very proud of him and all he and his mates do,and proud too of the girls they leave back home.
Take care
Mamyax

[andy-hughes]

Why not keep a daily diary for him, on tape or video?

Try to avoid saying you miss him, but make it a portrait of your life during this time, you can confide some thoughts you think he might like to hear when he gets back.

If you don;t like technology, just write it down.

[Paul22118]

CAJ1, this is not a cynical answer. Thank God he has gone to Iraq not Afghanistan.
He'll be back.

[CAJ1]

I'm a bit better now that I've managed to compose myself, it felt like the end of the world earlier lol! I'm going to keep myself busy, I've just made up a chart to mark the days off until he's home. I am going to do him a diary of the things I do and how I feel.

I know Paul22118, I am so thankful he is in Iraq and not Afghanistan as it takes a bit of the worry off but it doesn't lessen the amount I will miss him!

[CAJ1]

I'm going to moan to you lot rather than him. I last spoke to him on Friday and had a brief email yesterday and I miss him soooo much already and only 4 days have passed! I can be as busy as I want but I'm still missing him. I wish I could magic him back! :o(

[danchip]

dont wish for him to be back too hard god works in mysterious ways

[DaisyMae]

That is an unfortunate thought to put into the lass's mind at this time. I am convinced that a loving God does not show his concern for us by tricking us in that way.

Go on loving and missing him CAJ1, and long for him to be home, yes count the days, yes rejoice like mad when it is all over and I am sure that a just God will rejoice with you.

[CAJ1]

Danchip, I have also been praying that he and all the others are returned safely so I'm sure he will take that in to account!.

Thanks DaisyMae, on Saturday I thought I could do this and now after a few days I'm having a down day already! I was hoping I might hear from him today but not so far

[Schutzengel]

CAJ, How long have you been together, I just wondered, as sometimes the newness of a romance makes separation seem very hard. Your man is doing the job he chose to do, and it takes bravery to be a soldier in these uncertain times. What he needs you to do is be brave too, and when you write to him or manage to speak to him, try to be cheerful. Tell him you miss him, and are looking forward to having him home again. But please don't moan about how miserable you feel, because that won't do either of you any good. My friend has two very small children, and her husband is due to go to Afghanistan on 20th January for six months, so you can imagine how scared and vulnerable she feels, when soldiers out there are in great danger, with reports of deaths and casualties being a regular occurrence. Thank heavens your boyfriend is in Iraq, where things are a bit more stable. Your job now is to be strong for him. Best wishes, and take care of yourself until he is safely home.

[DaisyMae]

There will be lots of down days ahead I'm sure, but the opposite is also true and days of sunshine and optimism are there to sustain you through the darker days. Don't panic when you don't get the expected message, time to him is a totally different concept than it is to you - he is busy, with mates, in a new environment and probably having to fulfil tasks that are new to him. Enjoy the contact when you get it but don't convey your disappointment when you don't, it could make him feel resentful.

Good luck to you both.

[CAJ1]

We've been together for 2 and a half years. I came on here to have a wee moan as I don't want to get him down! I know he is relatively safe and I am thankful he's not in Afghanistan, I feel sorry for anyone who has kids and their partners are serving. This is the first time he has gone while I have been with him (although he has been to other places before including Iraq at the start of the war), he is leaving so should be his last posting. I don't think I could be with someone that did this on a regular basis and especially not if we were to start a family.

I know he can't always contact me and I definitly won't make him feel bad about it when he can't. I was looking forward to hearing him and knowing he was safe though

[DaisyMae]

We do understand hun, and we are happy to present a broad shoulder for you. He'll be back before you know it and you have your whole lives to look forward to. Perhaps some of the planning towards that could keep your mind off your loss a bit.

[CAJ1]

Thanks Daisymae, I think it'll be a bit easier a bit later on when I have adjusted but at the moment its crap! I appreciate any advice and any comments to shake me out of it lol!