I've got a Question for the men...and ladies too! :)

[krissy04]

A few weeks ago while i was working, this guy called in..Him and I talked for about an hour and he was all gunho( however that is spelt) about meeting me...He asked for my #, and said he would call. He never did call, so about after a week i called him. We got talking again, and once again he told me how bad he wanted to meet me and so on...once again he said he would call me...but he never did....so im standing my ground and not calling him back! I'm not upset or anything, i just want to know why when guys say there going to call, they dont?! Why cant they just say, " Oh i'll talk to you later." Instead of lying and saying," I'll call you tomorrow."????

[Hippy]

Quite often, when people say that the would like to join you in such and such or give you a call, or meet in so and so's they really do mean it. I think they continue to mean it right up to the point when they need to get ready to set off or pick up the phone. What happens then is a outbreak of self-doubt takes over and their insides go to jelly.

 

"What if I get to so and so's and they are not there? I'll not know anyone and everyone will know I've been jilted/rejected! I can pick up the phone, but what do I say? Maybe they were only being polite and don't really want me to call; I'll sound a proper plonker and a stalker as well. I know I said I would like to such and such with them, but I don't know the first thing about such and such, and what with them being such an expert I'll feel foolish. O what shall I do? What shall I do?"

 

Suddenly the time for action is over and the tension subsides. Excuses form about sudden colds or runs that prevented them from getting to the phone etc. Then they start to feel guilty about not phonoing/turning up and that prolongs the silence. In the end, they acively avoid the other person, not because of anything that you are or have done, but because they have had that awful moment of self-doubt and let the negativity take over for a moment.

.

[Scarlett]

Or it could be that certain men are spineless?

[Kev_UK]

I know some people say "I'll see you later" but that can mean later that day, week, year, etc. Sometimes people use it as an excuse, for example you are selling a car or something and they say I have to go now but I will be back with th money,, yeah..sure.

Has it ever occured to you that this guy could be married? or perhaps he is a womaniser and he says this to loads of different women?  I think it's time for you to forget him and move on. He had his chance and did nothing about it.. This is a good expression " you snooze, you lose"

[kestrel]

This guy sounds like a player. I bet he says this a number of times to other women. If he does not respect you enough to call when he say's he is going to, forget him and save yourself any future heartache.

[nicnicnic]

Oh thank god im not the only person waitn for a call!! You sound alot more self disciplined than me though! Good luck

[krissy04]

Thanks everyone...im not going to call him!!! Hes not married...but you guys are right, he probably says that to a lot of women..and if doesnt have enough respect to call me when he says hes going to...kestrel your right, hes not worth it!!! :)

[magicdice]

the vast majority of my male friends (who are aged 18-25 so know a lot about failing to call) tell me that calling their latest interest is on their mind constantly, but they don't want to seem to eager, and then they realise they've left it too late...

 

also guys: best line ever "text me when you get home safe" that way you sound like you care & also conversation is initiated

[Octavius]

When I end phone calls or conversations I always say 'speak to you later' - it is more out of habit than anything else.  I wouldn't expect that person to be hanging on expecting me to call them since I would consider later to be anything from later in the day to later in the year!  It depends on the context of the conversation and the person.  It sounds a bit rude as I write it down, but I don't like to be committed to a particular time of day or day of the week since I am quite forgetful and end up in a lot of trouble with the missus, friends and my mum!

 

Stand your ground, but in the meantime don't stand still !

[jayarnold]

Its a sure sign that this guy has already got a girlfriends/wife and he can't phone as he doesn't get much time away from her when he is able to call you.

I'm just being a man and pointing out the obvious, from experience.

[landie]

I guess he's married.

[misskim411]

hey if anyone does this it maybe becuz they're in a long term relationship that doesn't satisfy their dreams of Mr. or Ms. Perfert. So they explore their options on the side line seeking someone closer to perfect. Even though this is so they dont want to lose the sercurity they're current lover possesses nor do they want to lose what they have for someone who can turn out to be less. They're just trying to play it smart and not settle for less but should that even be critized?

If thats not the case I think your guy friend is not looking for a serious relationship maybe his life is his job or his family...and isn't ready to take the steps necessary to change that as yet.

or maybe he's a afraid to get hurt and too attached to quickly. And is protecting himself