What to Say ....

[DEN53]

Heard sad news yesterday - a chap Mr. Den works with (and a close friend) his son's cancer has returned - the lad is just 21 years old and was in hospital waiting to have both hips replaced, due to damage from last lot of chemo. His tempreture was high and remained so for 2 weeks - after tests its shown the cancer has returned.

He now has to have a bone marrow transplant and has only been given a 40% chance of survival. He is their only child.

[redman41]

Dear me DEN that is devastating news for the Family ! But there is always hope and while that remains you never know really

[4getmenot]

What type of cancer is it?

[China Doll]

I don't think there's anything you can say really, no words would do it justice. I guess you'll just have to listen and be supportive and do what you can, they'll know how much you care jsut from that.

[4getmenot]

my sisters newphew is 10 and going through chemo at minute but the support he's getting is amazing. And my god he's a little fighter.

[DEN53]

leukemia, 4getmenot.

He was always such a fit lad - in his teens he was a champion swimmer, winning medals and competing in Europe etc.

I agree Red - you must never give up hope, but I think at the moment its a devasting blow to them and it will take a while to muster all their strength and hope.

[DEN53]

^^ devastating^^ - should read above.

[4getmenot]

Being fit I'm afraid has no affect on how the body copes with things. My bloke has always been very fit and got cancer at age of 23

[DEN53]

I wonder 4getmenot, if the body can be too fit - I know that sounds silly, but pushing the body to extremes perhaps can do more damage than good.

My son is a fitness fanatic - he plays footie for 3 teams and the rest of the time spends his time at the gym. He drinks endless bottles of sports drinks and worries the life out of me.

[Sqad]

Den....Why do you have to say anything?
It will be obvious how you feel.
This sort of thing happens all the time and I worked for 2years at the Childrens Hospital, Western Bank in Sheffield and the ward was full of such cases.
I understand that if it is somebody that you know, it is quite different.

[DEN53]

I know Sqad, we don't have to say anything, and if it was me in their position, I would be totally deaf to any offers of sympathy.

[Sqad]

Den...exactly.

[4getmenot]

den as I've said plenty of times before its doeasnt matter how healthy you are, what food you eat, how much your smoke, I think cancer is in you when you are born and just develops.

[DEN53]

I totally agree with you 4getmenot - I was having this conversation with Mr. Den last night - I think family genes play a big part on how your body is made up.

When you see articles in the newspapers about some little old lady living to the grand old age of 100 + and she has smoked 40 fags a day and drank and perhaps also gave birth to 7 kids, but nothing cancerwise has touched her - it does make you think.