Over reaction to absent hubbie overnight??

[Smowball]

To cut very long story short, my OH was due to meet friends to watch a footie match on Saturday at about noon, and was then due home for dinner in the eve.I last got a txt at 6 pm saying he was still with them all in pub. so I replied saying ok, when do you think you will be leaving as it was about an hour home. He always always txts wen on train home. That was the last I heard from him. i left it a few hours, by now it was getting late. I rang his mobile but no reply. I didnt know the numbers of anybody that he was with, and this was totally out of character.By 1 am I was in such a state that I called the police, who were very lovely and although they didnt come round they told me to keep them updated.Morning came and still no word or sign, then about 8am I suddenly realised that I did have a mob number for the main friend that he met as it was on an invitation he had given us months ago. I flung open drawers and finally fouund it. called it but just rang out so left and voicemail and then a text. Half an hour later the friend calls to say that my OH got a bit the worse for wear and fell asleep on his sofa, and they couldnt call me as his mob started to play up! Says he was on his way home now.So I straight away call police to tell them the update and while Im on the phone to them he walked in the door. Not a sorry, not an apology, just sat down to watch tv. Well Im sorry but I exploded. I had imagined all sorts of things and the relief as seeing him was just too much. he did just sit there and take everything I said but still looked bemused and best he could come up with was that it wasnt planned. But when somebody has never ever done that in 8 years then I was bound to think the worse wasnt I??

[starone]

Yes - I would have been devastated and not been able to sleep all night. I think he would now be getting the sharp end of my tongue.

[pink-kittens]

sharp razored edge of mine

How horrible for you

[rowanwitch]

No excuse...inconsiderate at the very least... react away perfectly justified...

[ummmm]

I wouldn't be at all shocked by that. If my OH went to a mates house after the pub I wouldn't expect him home.

He's never done it though....I have picked him up from the pub when his mates have phoned me to tell me he's asleep.

It's just one of those things. Don't get too irate about it. Or, try not to..

[Smowball]

thanku guys, so its not just me. I literally made myself ill with worry, and still cant think was the hell posessed him. I can even understand falling asleep on the sofa, but surely one of the others cud have gone thru his fone and got my number to call me. I was even in the car at crack of light with my son looking round the streets. am still so upset

[cathfromsaron]

surely not an 'over-reaction'! he's lucky to have someone who cares! grrrr men! xx

[ummmm]

You obviously don't understand the drunken mind. It always seems like a good idea at the time..

[Smowball]

well this was totally out of character. If he even goies out for a drink with them after work then i dont expect to see him till early hours, stumbling thru door. But when its a lunchtime match he always always comes home by early eve, thats why I was so worried, no text, no reply to fone, and he was at least an hour away...

[B00]

I'd be furious too.

Staying out is fine, but it's common courtesy to let the wife/husband/whatever know.

[ummmm]

I understand your worry.....I would be worried. Drunk people tend to be a bit thoughtless. You've told him how you feel....no point carrying it on though.

[ummmm]

BOO - How can they do that if they're asleep? He probably wasn't planning on dropping off.

[Smowball]

I agree ummm, Im not going to carry it on - he has got up and gone to work and I have to do the same later . Its just that I got myself into such a sheer panic that my body and brain are having a hard time calming down.

[B00]

Everyone reaches the point where they think "errr, one more and i'll keel over" That's when you phone up, or get someone to do it for you.

And not even to apologise on his return? No sorry, unacceptable to me.

[ummmm]

I had that feeling once.....my reaction was enough for him to never do it again :-)

[ummmm]

/Everyone reaches the point where they think "errr, one more and i'll keel over"/

No they don't...believe me.

[B00]

we'll have to agree to disagree then ummmm. He had the opportunity to phone as soon as he woke- he didn't. He's had the opportunity to apologise any time from him getting home to going to work and still no apology? Not nice!

[RATTER15]

I never have done that and never would do it, I could never treat a woman with such little respect and cause her all that worry and upset.

[Midnightrider]

My reaction would have been the same

[Midnightrider]

Hold on....nobody could answer his phone for him? Boy has he got some explaining to do

[ummmm]

The apology....fair enough. But drunk people do not think "errr, one more and i'll keel over"

If they did you wouldn't see people lying in their own vomit....or with pissy pants.