Sad Event Over The Holidays

[Ric.ror]

Whilst I was busy with Christmas and other family problems
I did not notice any difficulties with my son and his partner of six years
Anyway they split up just before new year. I am really upset. I didn't see it coming - in fact I thought they would have been together for ever - they were so well suited.
I think I'm probably almost as upset as he is.
When I ask him if he thinks she might come back he is quite adamant they won't.

[Ric.ror]

Oh he's keeping his cards close to his chest like all men he's good at compartmentalise his life
He's already seen about transferring the mortgage to his name - if they wait until august it will be three years - affecting the deal they had. She said she's prepared to wait and they have agreed on a sum she will get, all a bit too slick if you ask me

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[murraymints]

a lot more to this than you know !! but...dinnae ask..ignorance is bliss !

[Ric.ror]

Oh I know she was always a bit cross about his social life - he is very popular(he really is the nicest of us all - my other sons partner said everyone loves him even people that don't like anyone) I'm kind of hoping she will just miss him so much she wants to come back
I'm also hoping that this is enough of a shock that he gets his act together
He had 'friends' around on Friday night and now his iPad is missing!!!!

[ummmm]

If they've already discussed the mortgage etc then it's likely this situation has been going on for quite a while.

[1ozzy]

Do you really want them to continue the life they obviously haven't being enjoying Ric.ror?

Or wish to support them both in creating a new life?

[waterboatman]

Wise words oz.

[waterboatman]

There is, obviously, something that neither want's to talk about. that is for them and them only. All you can do ric is be there for them if they need you they will be in touch.

[Ric.ror]

I know your all correct - but ...,,,,

[1ozzy]

I've been through a break up or two.

So has my wife.

We support our offspring in whatever decision they make, there has been some rather traumatic separations to deal with.

But!!!!, it is their decision.

[waterboatman]

I know what you mean ric. but...if you interfere unasked you risk alienating them both.

[1ozzy]

A hard situation to come to grips with Ric.ror.

Sit back, let the process take it's course.

Be ready to pick up pieces and support if required.

All the best, stay strong.

[ummmm]

I've also been through break ups and the time we were discussing the house was when it was over for good, no going back.

[murraymints]

NEVER look back !

[Ric.ror]

She was the nearest I'd ever get to a daughter
I'm not interfering and I am supporting him just as her parents are her - even her father told my son he did not want to fall out and I can't help thinking deep down they're hoping for the same end result as me
No harm in hoping is there

[ummmm]

Absolutely. When my daughter split with her boyfriend I really wanted them to get back together. What made it hard was him messaging me on facebook and my heart really went out to him....he was so sad.

[waterboatman]

Ric you've dona all you can. Just wait and hope.

[waterboatman]

dona? Done, even. duh!

[Ric.ror]

I'm giving you best answer WBM for making me smile ;-))

[1ozzy]

Keep smiling Ric.ror, there will be a light at the end of the tunnel.

Not necessarily an oncoming train either ;-/

[waterboatman]

The error was worth it then ric. Thank you. :o}