About The Worst Thing To Say ....

[rowanwitch]

When she arrived to see me the day after Dave died, my mother's second question was do you think you will look for someone else? I hadn't looked for Dave, and it was if nothing else thoughtless. I would be interested to know if anyone apart from WY, fell into a new relationship really soon after losing a partner. Was it loneliness, or just trying to fill the hole inside. ( that wasn't meant in a smutty way)

[NoMercy]

Naomi, when I met my OH he'd been on his own for 7 years and I'd not been in a serious committed relationship for 3 years. Suddenly being with someone meant not having everything your own way, having to give and take and all that jazz. Believe it or not, that can be difficult, particularly when you have been so independent. I didn't "need" a partner, but I felt I was ready to find someone, settle down and have a family.

You get out of any situation in life what you put into it and we both put a lot into our relationship. It's hard work at times, but worth it.

[tamborine]

None will tolerate my foibles of laziness, selfish, arrogant & prudish bitchiness ;)

[NoMercy]

Apologies, Rowan.

Give yourself time to grieve and heal. In time you will know if you want someone in your life again.

[ummmm]

I agree. I'm just thinking about when my father died. I dealt with it badly so I'm sure there was some very hard days for my partner. He still has to put up with me being over emotional on anniversaries/birthdays/fathers day etc....

He's never complained though.

[Sqad]

If you would wear silk underwear...........I would! ^^^^^^

[Sqad]

That was for tambo....LOL ( or any other interested parties.)

[tamborine]

My silk knicks keep slipping down & tripping me up

[NoMercy]

We had our first date in November 2015. Over Christmas I had a breast cancer scare and my selfish monster of a mother decided she didn't want to deal with all that carp so walked out of my life. I was in bits.

It was my OH, who had only been in my life a few short weeks, who was my rock during that difficult time. Just a few months later I had an ectopic pregnancy and for a time I think I lost my sanity. Lord knows how he coped, but he did. Without him I don't think I would have ever got through it all.

[kvalidir]

That's lovely NoM x

[naomi24]

NoMercy at 10:22, right...

[rowanwitch]

Dave wanted me to find someone else, I don't exclude it completely but let's just say I will not go looking for trouble.
Saying that i have just bumped in too a single male neighbour who offered his sympathy and the suggestion I might like to go out for a drink with him sometime.....

[Sqad]

Blimey.......that's a bit soon.........

[NoMercy]

Just be careful, Rowan. Some people prey on the vulnerable.

[woofgang]

Sqad, I am not martyred or crusading, nor am I a professional widow. I am well aware that people are different....but as said, that aspect of my life is over. I don't believe that people get two soul mates in this life.

[Sqad]

woofy....O.K ...message received and understood.

[rowanwitch]

I am not vulnerable, it's Dave's fault he boasted to all the chaps in the block about what a great cook I was, and what a great wife nudge nudge wink wink. All a load of large rear appendages but there you go...

Too soon for you Sqad.... it must be bad

[Sqad]

LOL ^^

[woofgang]

Sqad :)

[NoMercy]

If you feel it's right for you, then don't let anything stop you. Never mind what other people think!

[kvalidir]

Never say never Rowan, you deserve to be happy x