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assertiveness

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salisbury | 22:29 Wed 14th Feb 2007 | Relationships & Dating
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are all women attracted to assertiveness,? i have been told im goodlooking but am intelligent and sensitive rather than loud and bolshy. does confidence / assertiveness come with age? I am 24 now and have sometimes been told im too nice / bit of a pushover.

There are lads younger than me that seem to have the confidence / assertiveness that i need but arent necessarily great looking.

Its just so frustrating knowing i need to push myself but not doing it.......I NEVER ask girls out and feel id be gettin alot more out of life if i did














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There is being assertive, and there is being an over confident, arrogant idiot.

Just be yourself. Good luck
This is what I think

A WOMAN IS PRIMARILY ATTRACTED TO YOUR PERSONALITY.

Check this..

Good looks -- Good looks (for guys) help but aren't as important as most guys think.

Lots of money -- Guys think you have to be rich to be good with women. What can happen is, a rich guy might think "YES, I'm rich now I can get any women I want", so he is really confident, maybe a bit arrogant and THAT is what attracts the woman, not the money.

There's so many things which will subcommunicate your not an ALPHA male. Bodylanguage (not THAT important though), tonality (important), the words you say (important) etc.

If you're serious about this gimme your MSN or u can have mine and if u got any other questions I will do my best to answer. I do know of a resource that would massively help you if you really are serious about this.
I have a saying in life and that is you can't change a white dog into a black dog, and that is what a lot of people do, they meet someone and then they try to change them. So in your case you are trying to change yourself, and that is not the thing to do. If you are intelligent and sensitive then that is you, and believe me there are a million women out there who will love that, much more than some jack the lad who struts about thinking he is god's gift, in fact that is a real turn off (for me anyway!) So be yourself and find the person who is your true soulmate, she will probably be artistic intelligent and sensitive herself and she will love you for the way you are. Too nice??!! Impossible. Whoever is saying that to you is not for you. Maybe you need to move into some different circles, perhaps an art evening class or reading group. Good luck.
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hi flash, could i get your msn then?

cheers

I like quiet guys but they have to be confidant in themselves too.

You don't have to be the macho type but I think most women would like to feel that should anything bad happen the man would be assertive enough to defend her (verbally or physically.)

Don't be so hard on yourself. We don't all like the bolshy ones. If you have to change to get the woman you want she isn't the one for you. A woman will love you for who you are or she isn't worth it.
You sound fine already but I agree with lounurse - you seem a bit hard on yourself.
I have a saying in life - remember to love yourself.
Do you?
When you do that, it will shine out of you and all will come right.
All the best

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