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Interfaith marriages
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I am an atheist. My boyfriend is Muslim, though not particularly practising right now he intends to follow his religion better in the future and when asked me if I would consider converting, I said no. He said he wants to marry me anyway.
I think the main problem is his family would be very upset if he married a non-Muslim, I don't know what they'd do about it but they would not be happy.
Anyone had any experience with interfaith marriages?
I think the main problem is his family would be very upset if he married a non-Muslim, I don't know what they'd do about it but they would not be happy.
Anyone had any experience with interfaith marriages?
Answers
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Hi Idly, i am jewish and my boydfriend is born again christain, although i have found alot of faith thorugh th years of being with him, my parents who are both jewish wont want me getting married in a church and his parents dont really want us getting married in a snyaggue, so we will prob get married in a few years time in a huge castle/hotel/marquee and this will keep everyone happy, we will have a christian pratyer and a jewish prayer and keep it very much involved with both to keep both families happy!! never mind us being happy but we have to please everyone else eh?! Good luck all the best and and let me know if i helped you at all? xxx
Relationships where familial faiths are infused can often be complex. Interestingly, Judaic/Christian marriages are statistically ones who endure. However, according to anecdotal information, it often creates strain among conservative parents�on both sides.
The parental pressure in a Muslim/non Muslim relationship may be equally as challenging. Under Sharia law, you would be expected to convert to Islam, regardless of what your partner would want. I should imagine, if his parents are devout Muslim, it could make for an extremely sensitive environment and no matter how sound you and your partner are, the odds would be that his parents would constantly encourage (or worse) him to search for a �true� Muslim wife.
I�m fortunate to have many friends. Some are mixed Muslim/Christians, some Christian/Judaic and some Catholic/Protestant. Whilst I�ve never applied any science to my observations, I have felt the couples with the greatest challenges have been within the Catholic/Protestant environment.
It�s unfortunate that dogma can have such a powerful influence on developing and ongoing relationships. Often, where couples become pressurised or caught up in the complexities of these �tags,� they begin to lose sight of the spirituality of themselves.
In this instance, there�s a verse from the Koran which I should imagine his parents might offer up, in one of those loving, nurturing ways that parents so often do in an attempt to validate their position:
Continued:
The parental pressure in a Muslim/non Muslim relationship may be equally as challenging. Under Sharia law, you would be expected to convert to Islam, regardless of what your partner would want. I should imagine, if his parents are devout Muslim, it could make for an extremely sensitive environment and no matter how sound you and your partner are, the odds would be that his parents would constantly encourage (or worse) him to search for a �true� Muslim wife.
I�m fortunate to have many friends. Some are mixed Muslim/Christians, some Christian/Judaic and some Catholic/Protestant. Whilst I�ve never applied any science to my observations, I have felt the couples with the greatest challenges have been within the Catholic/Protestant environment.
It�s unfortunate that dogma can have such a powerful influence on developing and ongoing relationships. Often, where couples become pressurised or caught up in the complexities of these �tags,� they begin to lose sight of the spirituality of themselves.
In this instance, there�s a verse from the Koran which I should imagine his parents might offer up, in one of those loving, nurturing ways that parents so often do in an attempt to validate their position:
Continued:
Part 2
O Muhammad, tell the unbelievers [of Islam]; O unbelievers[of Islam], I worship not what you worship nor do you worship what I worship. And I shall never worship what you worship, nor will you worship what I worship. You have your religion and I have my religion. The Koran: Al-Kafirun, 109:1-6
I might also add that traditionally, Muslims have great respect for Christians as well as Jews, as it shows individuals are capable of spiritual growth.' Where they tend to have the greater challenges is with those who profess no faith in anything.
They are indeed complex issues.
I wish you every success.
Fr Bill
O Muhammad, tell the unbelievers [of Islam]; O unbelievers[of Islam], I worship not what you worship nor do you worship what I worship. And I shall never worship what you worship, nor will you worship what I worship. You have your religion and I have my religion. The Koran: Al-Kafirun, 109:1-6
I might also add that traditionally, Muslims have great respect for Christians as well as Jews, as it shows individuals are capable of spiritual growth.' Where they tend to have the greater challenges is with those who profess no faith in anything.
They are indeed complex issues.
I wish you every success.
Fr Bill
Hi! My sister is a Christian by up-bringing but doesn't practice. She married an Egyptian Muslim who is practising but I think his family is fairly liberal. She has not had to convert even tho' they married in Egypt. She has no problem with him practising his faith or bringing up their 2 children as Muslims. At least my sister and her husband share a belief in some sort of god. Might the fact that you are an atheist (by which you presumably mean you hate god?) cause problems? And have you thought about how you would want your shared children brought up? Thinking about things ahead of time and discussing them before marriage, as you obviously are, make for a smoother ride!
HannahHB: You�ve raised an interesting point. I�ll also add that there are several �Islamic� countries where Islamic/Christian faiths do cohabitate in relationships quite well. The predominate countries are Egypt, Turkey, Jordan, Syria, Ethiopia, and Iraq. Sadly, since the advent of America�s current administration�s policies, the once relatively quiet panacea has been in disruption and turmoil. Nevertheless, they remain as clear demonstrations of how our world should exist, in harmony and mutual respect.
With all due respect to Idly, I�ve always tended to privately question anyone�s assertion that they are Atheist and more accepted that they may actually be agnostic. Agnosticism suggests that you simply don�t know and therefore do not subscribe to any particular faith. One who professes to be an Atheist would have to actually apply themselves to the act of disbelieving. I should imagine that could be an often exhausting exercise in the face of all the gifts we receive each day. Nevertheless, in all cases, I respect everyone�s right to follow their own journeys.
Fr Bill
With all due respect to Idly, I�ve always tended to privately question anyone�s assertion that they are Atheist and more accepted that they may actually be agnostic. Agnosticism suggests that you simply don�t know and therefore do not subscribe to any particular faith. One who professes to be an Atheist would have to actually apply themselves to the act of disbelieving. I should imagine that could be an often exhausting exercise in the face of all the gifts we receive each day. Nevertheless, in all cases, I respect everyone�s right to follow their own journeys.
Fr Bill
Hello VillageVicar - You put your opinions across very well here, but I have to say that our family has been founded on unions between Catholics and Protestants. It might've cause problems many years ago, but is now no longer the case. I think the key to it, is in respecting and being tolerant of, your partner's wishes and beliefs, and not being side-tracked by outside objections. I know many people, and obviously come across all sorts of relationships. Fortunately, they're all intelligent & understanding people, believing that it's better to live and let live, and therefore be harmonious.
Slid_ : Thank you for your kind words. I assure you it has been a journey of discovery for me throughout my life. I continue to learn and am fascinated by the lovely people I�ve met here. It�s the diversity that impresses me most. I do believe that we must have all spectrums of colour in our life�s tapestries. Failing to do so makes life bland and incomplete.
I�m up late, writing a homily for a funeral in the morning. I�m challenged by the circumstances and it�s one of those nights when the clock screams at me, but the challenge prevails!
Ice: you are right. That spirit of harmony is essential for all of us. It extends across cultures, religions, races and our personal philosophies and values. Perhaps there will come the day when our governmental leaders embrace these values in guiding their countries.
Idly: Alaichem sholom!
Fr Bill
I�m up late, writing a homily for a funeral in the morning. I�m challenged by the circumstances and it�s one of those nights when the clock screams at me, but the challenge prevails!
Ice: you are right. That spirit of harmony is essential for all of us. It extends across cultures, religions, races and our personal philosophies and values. Perhaps there will come the day when our governmental leaders embrace these values in guiding their countries.
Idly: Alaichem sholom!
Fr Bill
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