Ex,s and keeping in contact

[Bri Friedman]

My ex rang out of the blue last week to say "Hi" We was only together for 8 months and i have no proof but I'm 99.9% she was seeing other guys. And met her new partner 2 weeks after dumping me.. Anyway while chatting on the phone i told her a few home truths as i never had my say when we split. Which I'm pleased i did she is still with this guy now so why phone me ? I feel better we spoke as i got things off my chest plus i know now what sort of person she is ringing me while she is with someone else.. I think she wants to play with my head again with which she is very good at.. It hurts deep down as i thought the world of this person only to be hurt. But i could never trust her i knew she had a past of affairs while married and seeing loads of guys. But i put that at the back of my head as that was her past and left it there.. Do i ignore her text/calls ? Tell her if she rings again not to bother and please delete my number ?

[Jugglering]

It sounds as though she was *at a loose end* and bored - I have an ex who used to ring me all time for a chat when he was bored and wasn't getting enough attention from his current partner. I got a bit fed up of this, told him so and just ignored his calls after that - he soon got the message. If she keeps contacting you, you could try not responding to text messages and just keep phone conversations short and clipped - let her do the talking and only answer with *yes* or *no* to any Q, don't volunteer any information and don't ask her any Q.

[Bri Friedman]

Hi Jugglering
She is an attention seeker that i did notice when i was with her..I never asked her any questions i told her a though home truths. She did most of the talking like she always did she does get bored very easy with things like jobs,MEN.
I was going to ignore her calls but i know she would just keep ringing. So i thought if she calls again i might txt tell her not to phone and delete my number.
She one of these people who will only talk when she's ready. If she don't want to talk then you have to wait till she's ready..
Thanks for your advice

[haysi06]

Hi Bri, I think that the best thing you can do is ask her politely not to contact you. She may not respect your wishes as she may think that she has more to say to you. Is it an option to change your phone number? At the very least you should not respond to her texts. It sounds to me like you had a lucky escape!

[Bri Friedman]

Hi haysi06
If she does contact me i think i will do as you say..
Deep down i know Ive had i lucky escape but for some reason i cant get her out of my head.
I was blinded by what was really going on i new things weren't right..
Thanks for you advice

[Petal~flower]

Bri, if she contacts you again, I wouldn't be polite and ask her not to contact you again.

I would just ignore the calls and the texts.

You say you "cant get her out of your head" well, by keeping contact with her, she will always be in the back of your mind, wondering if she is going to contact you or not.

As from today, make it you time to move on. No more contact. Not even a nice text asking her not to reply OK!

Wish you luck

[Bri Friedman]

Hi Petal
I know the contact would make it harder for me.
I'm pleased we did speak as i do feel i told her some home truths i wasn't nasty just straight.
That was one reason why it was on my mind a lot because when she said it was over i just said OK and walked away.
I never said things which i wanted to say.
If she texts i will ignore them if she rings then i will tell her id rather her not contact me.
I deleted her number the day she said it was over and deleted the number again when she rang
Thanks petal

[Petal~flower]

hi again Bri,

If she rings you again, you DONT answer her call. It may be difficult but DONT.

Believe me Bri its better for you in the long run. Cut all ties now.

Take it from someone who has been there. And who is now a lot happier

[sleepyj]

petal hello

[Petal~flower]

hiya sleepy mate :-)

[Bri Friedman]

I know what your saying shaz
Your right i know what i have to do..
This will sound sad for a man but i thought the world of her she was everything i wanted in a women apart from her sh@ging around.
I take ages getting over someone i just thought she might of been the one....
Thanks again xx

[888sally888]

Morning Bri

I agree with everyone above - dont go back there. She is probably bored and not getting attenion from her new boyfriend and assumes she can have contact with you again.

You sound a nice guy and I am sure you can find someone who deserves you in the future.

Ignore her calls and if she texts just say that 'who is this - i dont have this number on my phone'.

Move on with a clear head and be happy. Sal x

[lorri24601]

either ask her not to call again as you dont think its fair on your new girlfriend :-)
or get a female friend to answer and say "oh you again" laugh pitifully and then say you are likely to unavailable to speek to her for the foreseeable future.

[lil123]

I have exactly the same with my ex husband he was always having affairs behind my back and going missing for days he really treat me like crap
when he is single or not happy with who ever he is with he calls me or sends texts saying how great I am etc and how he wishes things were different etc
I still have feelings for him but I know it can never be with him again and I try not to reply and I only speak to him regarding our son
I think in time you will move on and meet someone who will not treat you like she did as not all women do that !!
You could ignore her or tell her bluntly that you are not interested
Just focus on what you really want and it will happen and being single int that bad sometimes x
Michelle

[Bri Friedman]

Hi sally / lorri / lil
I new deep down what i have to do.
I will tell here not to phone again if she does contact me i don't need a female like this. And i know all females are not the same i must just be going for the wrong type.
I do feel better as Ive said since i spoke to her since she had my number still she probably had all her ex,s in her phone. Plus it doesn't say a lot for her bloke if she is ringing other men.
Thanks again x

[Bri Friedman]

I do have to say I've learnt a lot from myself from this relationship..
Ive always wanted a relationship and kids (i didn't push for this in this relationship or any others)
But since we have split it made me think as I'm touching 40 this year and got set in my ways do i really want children now..
Ive always thought of other people before myself from now on its about me.
As from today I'm closing the book on that relationship and moving on.
You have all helped thanks

[lil123]

Good for you !!!
You sound like a male version of me I always attract the wrong types and put up with them as I was so scared to be on my own BUT not any more!
Its not always easy being single but a lot damn happier than with someone who treats you like that
You could always change your number too if that is a issue
Just be yourself and you will meet the right person to have children with
Take care xx