ChatterBank1 min ago
do men with partners watch porn or do i need to worry
60 Answers
i have been on my partners laptop and well i seem to find is port and weather sites and of coruse facebook but i am not bothered about most of then but the porn sites. we dont do it that often cos he is tired after work and i am at work late some night but should i let it go and let him watch porn or how do i let him know it is not right i have in the passed and he just flips not in a violant way but not happy when i ask him if he wanks when i am not about he just wont tell me what is wrong with him or is it me should i not know that kind of think we have been together now 5 years and we live together
please help me
please help me
Answers
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.It is your problem. Sorry.
Sex takes effort...sometimes people just can't be bothered. Porn fills the gap.
If it makes you feel any better my OH watches porn. If he was given the option at the very moment he felt horny he'd chose 'real' sex. Chances are...I'm asleep and he knows that waking me could be painful for him....so porn it is.
Sex takes effort...sometimes people just can't be bothered. Porn fills the gap.
If it makes you feel any better my OH watches porn. If he was given the option at the very moment he felt horny he'd chose 'real' sex. Chances are...I'm asleep and he knows that waking me could be painful for him....so porn it is.
I'm guilty often of not using a capital 'I' ClaireBare but do you not think that was a wee but cheeky just posting to say that?Hi BTW if youre the same one I know of :) See youve just joined and already the grammar is irksome -get used to it -often goes with the territory doesnt mean we are illiterate though lol !!
babs -my OH looks at porn -funnily enough once youve said you dont mind it takes half the fun away.I look at it as well.I'd just advise as the others have to just view it as normal behaviour and dont try to catch him out -I hate when someone does that to me -feel sheepish and silly and defensive.
babs -my OH looks at porn -funnily enough once youve said you dont mind it takes half the fun away.I look at it as well.I'd just advise as the others have to just view it as normal behaviour and dont try to catch him out -I hate when someone does that to me -feel sheepish and silly and defensive.
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The first thing you need to understand about male masturbation habbits is that pornography is not an 'instead of', it's an 'as well as.
Although you may feel rejected because your personal sexual activity is low, it doesn't mean he prefers masturbation to sex with you - it's simpy that it's easy, quick, and takes no thought on his part, which makes it attractive to almost all men.
If you really feel he is prefering that to sex with you, then you need to discuss it, but go carefully.
All men grow up with the notion that masturbation is a 'guilty pleasure', so it is something he won't want to discuss specifically, so don't ask for details.
Approach this from another angle - try instigating some sex yourself, and don't be shy!
You may find that taking control is something you both enjoy, so take a deep breath and see what happens - be prepared to be patient though, he may have just got out of the habit, and alpsed into simple self-satisfaction because it's easier.
You may not stop him enjoying pornography, but if you are secure in your own sex life with him, you can see it for what it is - a simple 'add-on' when he feels the need.
Good luck.
Although you may feel rejected because your personal sexual activity is low, it doesn't mean he prefers masturbation to sex with you - it's simpy that it's easy, quick, and takes no thought on his part, which makes it attractive to almost all men.
If you really feel he is prefering that to sex with you, then you need to discuss it, but go carefully.
All men grow up with the notion that masturbation is a 'guilty pleasure', so it is something he won't want to discuss specifically, so don't ask for details.
Approach this from another angle - try instigating some sex yourself, and don't be shy!
You may find that taking control is something you both enjoy, so take a deep breath and see what happens - be prepared to be patient though, he may have just got out of the habit, and alpsed into simple self-satisfaction because it's easier.
You may not stop him enjoying pornography, but if you are secure in your own sex life with him, you can see it for what it is - a simple 'add-on' when he feels the need.
Good luck.
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