When would you call time on a friendship?

[Jenarry]

I've always stuck with relationships through thick and thin but I'm having real trouble at the moment with a friend and I'm not quite sure what to do so advice would be really appreciated.
The friend in question is my former best friend who i occasionally have ups and downs with.
She is quite demanding as a friend and sometimes she will create a huge disagreement from next to nothing and is made in to a huge drama ,which is not my way and so I find it hard to handle sometimes.
But she has also been a rock for me during the hardest times i've ever had to go through so i also have a lot to thank her for.
. we had a falling out last year that really caused some bad feeling between us and now after about 10 months we were trying to arrange a meet up to talk things out but i'm feeling really apprehensive about it.
I know that sorting things out will make for a nicer atmosphere between us and our mutual friends and lift the bad feeling away from us but I'm not really sure if i can get over the way she has carried on recently.any thoughts please?....

[ummmm]

Are you happier with or without her in your life?

[karenmac60]

I think you have to weigh up the pros and cons - is her help worth all the drama? If something terrible happened in your life could you get through it without her? If you then decide you still need her in your life you just have to accept the drama that goes with it. I fell out with my best friend and didn't see her for a year and a half. Then we sorted things out and everything was great for a good few years. Then we fell out again and I lost all means of contacting her and I really missed her! I finally tracked her down just before Xmas and we are in touch but taking it slowly, but I want to work it out because not having her in my life is a lot worse than having her and all her dramas. Whatever you choose, good luck x

[Answerprancer]

If she has been more of a 'rock' than rocky, you usually get on and have a lot of history then I'd be more inclined to hang on in there if I were you - life's too short, allies are precious things.

[society]

In everyone there's good, and bad, we all have faults. I think you should listen to your conscience.

[Jenarry]

That's a good question Ummmm. she was very good for talking things through and excellent at advice giving and just being there for me and fun to be with but she's a bit of an all or nothing person .who I'm sorry to say this about her but is a bit insecure and thinks everyone should revolve around her and so she makes her relationships(not just with me) quite hard work and quite violatile.i feel i owe it to her for all the support she has given me to try to make amends but i'm not sure if too much has happened to do this.

[society]

Since you feel you 'owe' her in some ways, perhaps you should get back on speaking terms with her but not keep her as your best friend. Just a thought...

[ttfn]

Jenarry, I would ask myself for what do i want from a friend? A lot would depend on the reason of the fall out (and subsequent behaviour). It is a good idea, imo, to try and discuss how you both feel about this. I have strong principles and I will not compromise them, for anyone. I am prepared to own up to being in the wrong and will always apologise. However, in the end, if i decide a friend has not the character I expect of a friend, then i will let them know how I feel, and try to part as amicably as possible. True friendship is a wonderful thing but have must have respect on both sides.

[Jenarry]

it could be so easy to get past all this but my friend is still being very defensive about it all and argumentative, i just need her to chill out and say that we can put it all behind us but no-she would rather create more drama. i just feel like i can;t cope with her demands and expectatons of me
we are not teenagers for godness sake. we're in our 30's and i have a lot going on in my life and don't really .have the time or patience for this kind of storm in a teacup stuff anymore

[ELVIS68]

She sounds like a pain in the arse, true friends aren`t like that

[Jenarry]

she is a rock when she is needed...but she can be a right royal pain in the ass and she has fallen out with just about every friend she has at some point of other, i;m pretty laid back and have never had a friendship like this and never had to deal with this sort of high expectations of a friendship.

[ELVIS68]

I hate the "rock" word, it`s so Paul Burrell / Diana

Like I said, true friends aren`t like that, if she was a true friend she would understand how you feel and not be in your face all the time