Find It Hard To Comfort Daughter

[bednobs]

hello i was wondering if anyone else got this? If my daughter is upset, she will always go to her daddy for comfort. The other night he was out walking the dogs and she woke up scared, screaming and crying. She wouldn't even let me touch her! As soon as he came in he picked her up and she snuggled into his shoulder and went back to sleep. I feel most miserable about hte fact seemingly i cant provide comfort.
do i
1) try to change her
2) try to change the way i feel about it or
3) revel in the fact our tea is ready to eat and she's crying but mr bednobs will have to go to her?:)

[woofgang]

Not sure how you can change her bedknobs, that must hurt.

[sherrardk]

Has it always been like this or is it a new thing?

[anneasquith]

wee ones do go through phases don't they ?

[Psybbo]

Bednobs, lovely to see you. Don't worry, if you relax around her she will change xxx

[bednobs]

thanks all. If im honest she's always been a daddies girl, and because of my disability, i find it hard to pick her up (and always have done really). Woofie, i think the way to change her could be that I am always the one to comfort her. But then again, poor Mr 'nobs would miss out :(

[tonyav]

I wouldn't worry about it to much, bednobs. I remember my three going through phases like this when they were small.

[pastafreak]

She will sense your stress...better to be glad that daddy can also give her comfort. Please don't see this as permanent or a sign that she does not love you,or that there is some fault in you. Its just the way things are...go with the flow. Maybe this is just another 'daddy's little girl' phases.

[pastafreak]

Your comment was not there when I started to answer....daddies little girl it is then..:-)

[Tilly2]

It'll be fine. Let Mr bednobs do his bit. Things will change.You'll see.

[Sqad]

No idea bednobs...............just nice to see you back again.

[bednobs]

hey sqad - still not dead then?

[bednobs]

whoops, i meant to add a smile on there to show i was just being cheeksome :)

[Sqad]

LOL...plenty of attempts on my life.........but no, still here.

[Psybbo]

Sqad, you might want to look at a post in Society & Culture, I'm sure you could advise xx

[rockyracoon]

Hi Bednobs, nice to see you back :)

I had the reverse problem, my daughter would only come to me and could really ignore her dad at times, he said it didn't bother him but I know it did. I just kept encouraging him to do things with her but I know that might be difficult for you.

[Sqad]

Thanks Psybbo..........;-)

[Prudie]

My daughter was just the same when she was a ttoddler and I really beat myself up about it. Id not worry because she will turn to you about other stuff when she's older. I know it hurts though.

[woofgang]

I mean this nicely but i don't think it would help to be always the one to comfort her if AT THE MOMENT she doesn't find you comforting. You can't force feelings in adults, let alone in children. Does he enjoy doing other things with you?

[bednobs]

:0 you are of course (as ever) right

[sherrardk]

Try not to worry about it (especially if your oh is managing to calm her down), she'll need you for other stuff and in different ways (ie where you don't have to pick her up, etc) soon enough.