The One

[Chasingcars]

How do you know when you have found 'The One'.
How do you know that what you have is as good as it gets and not to carry on waiting for something else that may or may not exist!?

[andy-hughes]

The sort answer is - you don't!

I think it is a rare person indeed who has not settled down / married, and in the course of there life, met someone else and seriously wondered if they made the right decision.

You have to make a decision, and stick with it, if it remains right for you.

You cannot live your life heding your bets against someone that may, or may not come along. If that is the uppermost feeling in your mind (and your question may be hypothetical, I'm not judging here) then you are not ready to settle down yet.

Hope this helps.

[Chasingcars]

Thanks, its kind of hypothetical as im not married but have met someone who i have now been with for 7 months. He 'ticks all the boxes' if you know what i mean so pretty sure he is the one but its just interesting to hear other peoples thoughts about how they knew/ know when the time / person is right.
Where other relationships have failed for certain reaons, like age, background, behaviour, i have none of these issues with my current boyfriend.

I dont doubt there is more than one person out there for all of us but i guess its who we find first isnt it!

Im not ready to settle down yet as i came out of a long traumatic relationship only about 2 years ago so just enjoying me time still as well. My boyfriend is cool with this and he is not putting any pressure to tie the knot but just interesting to know that if im happy with him, why wait for someone/ something that may not exist!
I think im just bad at making decisions....!

[andy-hughes]

Based on the additioanl info, I think you will both know if you want to move things onto a more permanent commitment, when that time comes.

The present Mrs Hughes (Keeps her on her toes!) and I were together for six years before we got married, and that ws nearly 22 years ago, and I have no regrets.

I have had one occasioan when I seriously thought I had met 'the one' - but I had made my commitment, and you simply have to be rational and adult about these things.

If you have no serious problems, just enjoy being together, and move on if you wish, and not if you don;t. Fortunately there is far less pressure to 'settle down' than there used to be - and if you get any, firmly ignore it, it's your lives, your choice.

Be happy!

[tigwig]

it sounds corny but I think you just know and if you have to ask about it then maybe he isn't the one! In my case I met my now husband when I was seeing his friend and we eventually got together after weeks of fighting the urge because neither one of us had the confidence to say anything. Once we were together we almost never left each others sides and against all advice we gradually lost touch with friends because we never wanted to be apart and are still a bit like that now 16 years later!

[spudqueen]

Some people would ask themselves the question 'could I spend the rest of my life with this person?'

That's not the question to ask yourself, the one you should ask is 'could I spend the rest of my life without this person?'

[Puddintane]

Their is always more than one out there somewhere. If this person has no glaring faults and your sure they don't. They treat you with respect, dignity, love, knidness and are completely open to discuss all matters, without any reservations and you are attracted to them. I think
you may have found the RIGHT person. You must also
feel secure with them when they are near.

[darcydark]

I think the question you would ask to answer your question would be, Can I live without him? If youe answer is NO then it sure sounds like he is the one.

[enjoyingit]

Isn't the answer to this...Is there really a perfect anyone for anyone? Why not live the moment and be as happy as you can be, rather than expecting or wishing or wanting someone or something else to come along...if there is supposed to be something as the ONE then he or she will come looking for you!