Missing children

[MrBen5]

Going off an earlier answer in a post.
Have any of you who have children ever left your children, in a public place, to go to use the bathroom, ice cream van,etc.
If so, do you think that you are in the same 'class of bad parenting' as the parents of missing Madaline?
If not why not?

[Goodsoulette]

I let my 5 yr old use the toilet at work on his own. He isn't allowed to use mens toilets either. He's not allowed out to play on his own, hes not allowed out in the garden without me watching because both front and back have very easy access to the street.

Lots of mums let there kids out younger than him in my street. I did draw the line once when a 2 year old was playing in the street and I went to find his mum and she was getting wrecked round another neighbour's house.

There is green within sight of my house and I had been contemplating recently what age I would let him play there. i think maybe 8.

[tattoo1094]

MrBen
as someone said earlier i dont think it is as bad, purely because they did have a choice in using a babysitting service and chose not too. Unfortunately i think alot of parents have left there children unattended but it is to a degree and depending on how old they are.
My son rode his bike home from school when he was 10 im leaving him unattended..... is this as bad.............or have i thank god just been lucky.

[4getmenot]

I was left in Mcds in America at 7 years old :-( I love using that against mum now to make her feel bad. Ha ha. secretely I think they meant to :-) lol

[redcrx]

yep it was deliberate 4get :)

My sons not 2 yet so hes never far from my sight. he does play in garden alone at times, if Im cooking dinner etc. But gate is locked and no-one can get in or out and I can see him in most areas.

[tattoo1094]

Trigger, how do you know the member of staff is not a sexual deviant?

[tattoo1094]

ok nice one !!!

[nutgoneflake]

I can't stand even to let one of my boys walk with me, and one trail behind. If I've got only one hand free to hold one of their hands, I make the other walk in front where I can see him. That may sound a bit extreme, but I can't relax unless I can see both. That is for all kinds of reasons though - main roads on our way to school, cars reversing out of driveways, concealed entrances etc.
I've never left them alone. My 6 yr old wants to know when he can walk to the shop by himself. (200 yards away, no roads to cross) I've told him maybe 8. When we're out and I need the loo, they come with me. I've let them go together to the boys' loo in Asda, but I've been right outside getting funny looks from people walking past, as I kept pushing the door open and calling in!!

[4getmenot]

I knew it, you were in on it too redcrx

[tattoo1094]

Is there an age limit as to when your children can be left alone ,14 i was told seems a bit extreme, what happens when they get to 16 and only have mummy and daddy to look after them they wont have a clue, they will be petrified of every one that looks at them sideways

[Goodsoulette]

On a slightly different not, there is a woman who lives up the road from me. Yes she does let her 4 year old play in the street which is a bone of contention with me but the other thing she does that drives me nuts is she has a different fella living with her every 2 weeks. The kids immediately get told to call him daddy??????? and she goes off doing what she wants leaving her kids with this fella she knows nothing about. The last one was dealing coke, the one before that pot and stolen goods always going in and out. I think this is bad enough but its only a matter of time before she leaves her kids with a guy who is dating her to get to her children.

Trust no one.

[smudge]

Hear, hear Goodsoulette!

[MrBen5]

Hmmm, very well said Goodsoulette...

[tattoo1094]

same here goody!!

[ELVIS68]

I wouldn`t leave them, if one of them needs a pee, we all go, always to a toilet though, I wouldn`t dream of peeing in an ice cream van

[enigma]

I always go with my kids to the toilet and even if it disrupts my meal - tough. I would rather have indigestion than put my kids at risk. My eldest daughter is nearly ten and I still make excuses to go with her by saying that I am needing to go too, instead of embarrassing her by saying that I am keeping an eye on her. You can never be too careful and I am especially guarded around public toilets after hearing about the poor girl who was raped in the toilet in Sainsburys.

There is a fine line though between being too overprotective and allowing your kids freedom to be kids. Are predators REALLY more prevalent nowadays and are our kids exposed to more dangers than we were, or do we just hear more about these types of cases now? I remember running home to my mum blubbing about a man in a red car who tried to snatch my friend and I off the street when we were ten. We were walking the short distance home from school together and he stopped to ask directions. I kept a safe distance but he tried to get me to lean in closer by saying that he couldn't really hear me and asked me to open the door. I was immediately suspicious and refused and he laughed and said that he didn't bite. He asked us to jump in and show him the place where he wanted to go and when we refused, he tried to grab us. There but for the grace of god we got away. My husband accuses me of being far too over protective of our kids and says that he was allowed to go away all day with his brothers as long as he was home before dark but I will never allow my kids to do that at their ages.

[legend758duo]

when i was home a month ago my 4 year old son needed the toilet in asdas.
i take him in and he goes in the cubicle on his oewn.
i wait outside the door,and no i looked to see no deviants inside.
hes a big boy he says so i let him in.but leave him?
never.
i try to hold his hand all the time when in shops and watch him like a hawk.
if anyone touches himthey will be hung.
ill letthe police argue with me later.


goody great point.
its not stranger danger its mummys friends that can be the biggest danger.

it seems folk on ab are in agreement on this.


btw theres no minimum age for leaving kids.i answered this last week.but they must have a form of contact with you and mustnt be ledft where they are in any immediate danger.oh and cant be left overnight either.


this says it better than my ramblings.

http://www.nspcc.org.uk/helpandadvice/parentsa ndcarers/homealone/homealone_wda35965.html

[smudge]

I read about the girl who was raped in Sainsbury's too enigma.

The very next time I went into our local Sainsbury's, I asked to speak to the Manager, letting him know what I'd read about what had happened in one of their other stores toilets.

He assured me that their Security Guards regularly check in & around the toilets, but it still put me off of being in there alone - let alone a child!

I don't trust anyone these days!