Fathers access to child?

[pearly333]

I know my childs father will be able to gain access through court, would he ever be able to take her away when visiting??
There is no reason why he shouldn't, just that the area he lives in is rough and I don't want her going there...???

[bednobs]

of course he should be allowed to take her away! are you seriously suggesting he will never have her overnight, or want to see her away from your house? he has as much right as you do to have the child live with him, and could fight you for that if he was inclined to do so.

Is he on the birth certificate?

And why should he go to court for access? why not make it easier on your daughter and just allow him to see her without having to go through the courts.

As for living in a rough area - did it bother you when you were sleeping with him? If he's moved there since, well he is still the same person no matter where he lives, surely you cant be shallow enough to think that just because he lives somewhere you consider rough, he would let her come to harm?

The long and short of it is you chose him to be the dad, and no matter how unpalatable it seems you have to put up with being tied to him forever, including where he choses to live

[pearly333]

You haven't answered the question

[lozzylou]

what is the question then as i would have answered the same

[bednobs]

yes i have in the first sentence - the answer is yes, unless it was seriously not in the interests of the child for him to have unsupervised visits. Living in a rough area wouldn't qualify for that!

[redcrx]

bednobs, you slipped up, perhaps you should have given the answer pearly wanted rather than the right one :)

pearly, please forgive bednobs manners, what answer do you want?

[bednobs]

lol redcrx, I should have thought about that

[bednobs]

lol redcrx, I should have thought about that

[pinktwink]

this is more about your own anxirties than where your ex partner lives. If he is prepared to be involved withhis daughter then you must believe in his ability to protect her.
Where her dad lives and what he does is part of who she is and is at the core of her identity she needs to be allowed to experience this freely
Its vital you dont pass yur anxities on to your daughter or she too will be in fear. At the end of the day danger lurks out there in sociaety and there is no place that escapes it. Have faith in your partners ability to keep his daughter safe