Influence from my eldest?

[Chapelle]

My 5 year old son just walked into the front room and said "all you bitches better watch your backs, i'm the mack daddy." I'm a little concerned as to where he got it from, and why he decided to use this phrase! My eldest son is very much into his heavy metal, and something called "Death Thrash" - I'm wondering if that might have something to do with it? Son B, the elder quite frequently has friends over to the house for late night sessions, what on earth he is getting up to in his room with 2 other girls until 4am is quite beyond me. That aside, I'm still very concerned about my 5 year old (Son A). Is it possible that Son B is having a negative impact on the otherwise wholesome upbringing that me and my wife have strived to provide? I hope not, as we've endevoured to keep our parenting straight down the line for both kids. I do hope Son A doesn't turn into a "Gangbanging Metalhead" like my other son seems to be doing! All answers greatly appriciated. Yours worried, A Dad.

[andy hughes]

This may not offer a lot of comfort, but for what it's worth - the phrase your youngest son is using is 'gangsta' langauge, and it comes from a lifestyle and music based on urban black culture, which is about as diamterically opposed to the thrash metal your older son enjoys as you can get! At five, your youngest son is not able to assimilate any influences from your older son, the phrase he has heard is something he's picked up, and does not understand. Best to ignore it, if you make it an issue, he'll do it all the more. If future disturbing phrases occur, try and find out where he heard them, without making it a major issue, and advise him calmly that such words make Mum and Dad sad, and they are not nice - that's as far as you need to go at that age. I would be concerned that your son has friends over until four a.m., girls or boys - maybe a few house rules on entertaining guests would be a step in the right direction.

[Scarlett]

Your elder son sounds like he is just doing normal teenage things, liking extremes of music.. for me it was goths, and currently it is thrash metal. He will grow out of it. I teach 16 year old boys, and they all like this music, but by 18 they have grown out of it. I agree with Andy, just ignore that phrase. He is just repeating something he heard. I also agree that you shouldn't let your older son have guests round until that time, especially if you don't know what he is getting up to!! What's wrong with 11pm?

[Chapelle]

So, the incesant thrashings from my son's room is nothing to worry about? I thought they were playing trampoline on the bed, and I've told them to quite down before now. I'll have to investigate that one further. Being 17, and not knowing his place in this world - I think it's right for him to experiment. I'm not going to discriminate against him for wanting to try forms of sex, drugs and mind alteration. I'll be on hand if it gets out of control mind, the last thing i want is a sex maniac junkie son who steals from his savings to buy smack. As for my 5 year old son, I think I'm going to isolate him from the older. Seems like a little sensory depravation is in order. My Mother used to put me in the coal hole when I'd done something bad - worked for her.. ..why can't it for me? Thanks for your responses all, good to have another insight - no matter how wacky. Regards A Dad

[georgit79]

You have said that your eldest son is 17. In this case, he is displaying perfectly normal behaviour for a boy his age- I should know, I have three younger brothers- but I don't think he should be having friends round in his room until 4 in the morning. That's a bit excessive, in my opinion, and should should start to put your big daddy foot down!

[Ali_Dilkes]

What about your eldest's friends parents, do they not care about their children? im my day i haad to be in by 9 until i was 21 and if i wasnt the 12 inch punishment came out! Now you can see where all the teenage crime and bad behaviour comes from. disgusting!