Waking 3 yr old every night coming into my room

[tgm1974]

Has anyone experienced the following with their young children :

My son has just turned 3 yrs old and for the past 12 months (give or take the odd night), he will get up anytime between 1-4am and come into our room. We wont allow him in the bed and one of us will always get up and put him back to bed. I dont know if there is a reason for this behaviour from him and just wondered if any other parents had experienced the same - and did it stop or how did you stop it.

When he goes to bed we do lie with him. Thats probably my fault since him being a baby I used to love being with him til he fell asleep plus cos I was back in work I think I felt a little guilty not being with him - this just gave us some mellow time with each other and time for cuddles.

He does understand about going to bed on his own now and not Mum/Dad laying with him til he falls asleep but we are still geting to that point of putting him to bed and walking out --- at the min I put him to bed and when he is part falling asleep I will leave, just so hes aware Im going.

Any advice/help then many thanks.

[jaydah]

He's still a babe & needs security from you - quite normal. Worry when he needs to share your bed at 20y.

[tgm1974]

LOL!! Very funny JAYDAH ...........

I know if I slept all night in his room and did a quick "ssshh" when I heard him waking, he would fall back asleep again til the morning.

Think I need to get some form of recording mechanism that I can record my "ssshh" on and when he wakes it goes off automatically. Its not an issue with us putting him back to sleep, just wish he would sleep through and not come walking in!

[horseshoes]

Our son used to do exactly the same thing. I always took him back, but he tried his luck - successfully too - at going round to my husband's side of the bed. My husband just used to draw him in to the bed and he'd happily go back to sleep. One day, after a couple of months, he just stopped wandering in. Simple as that. I think they just need to know that you're there.

[jaydah]

Get him a companion eg brother or sister - he'll be bored with you then :)

[tgm1974]

I think the brother/sister will be after we get married in June so hopefully he will have stopped by then but I will have the broken nights with a new baby - LOL!

[ummmm]

My eldest son slept with me from birth until about a week before his brother was born. I was really worried about how I was going to get him to sleep in his own bed. I explained to him that he had to sleep in his own bed because a new baby was coming....and he did...just like that.

[karenmac60]

Has he recently been potty trained? Is there a chance he's getting up through the night to go to the toilet and maybe getting a wee bit confused/missing mum so ending up in your room?
If it's just that he is missing you, you could try taping yourself reading some of his favourite stories and putting the tape on in his room - maybe the sound of your voice will be enough to sooth him.

[dotty.]

blimey this takes me back, my eldest son was like this from being 2 years old, drove us mad, but it all stopped when he was 3 when my daughter was born and shared a room with him, he never did it again after she arrived.

[ladyalex]

Our son did this too. Being total softies, (and too tired with work etc ) we used to just let him in with us. He stopped overnight once he started going to school.
As jaydah says, worry about it if he's still wanting to come into your bed when he is 20.

[Mully79]

My daughter's just turned 5 and still does this. Occasionally she sleeps right the way through but that's normally when she's completely shattered. We still lie with her til she goes to sleep, like you it's a nice time to have a cuddle and I know I'll miss it when she's older and she'll grow out of it eventually. She's only just recently stopped having a wee in the middle of the night, and we've noticed she'll jump in with us later now - 4 or 5am rather than 1am-ish, so no doubt she's getting to the point of sleeping right the way through.
Unless it's bothering you / affecting your sleep, I don't see it as being a problem? Your son will grow out of it when he's ready. I just see it as something I'll miss when she's older, so enjoy it while it lasts :)

[cathfromsaron]

try a sticker chart?
if he isn't ill and its just habit, the carrot and stick approach will work wonders!
and don't lie with him for long (getting less and less) and he will grow out of it!

cath x

[Ice.Maiden]

Our sons both did this, which we didn't mind at all, but by putting them into the same room eventually, the habit stopped. I think it's just a comfort thing, to know that you're there, and they can come in for a nice warm snuggle. I wouldn't worry about it too much.

[tgm1974]

Thanks everyone - maybe I should tell Daddy that this brother/sister needs to be a little earlier than planned - LOL!

My son is completely potty trained and is always dry through the night. On the very odd occasion I have had to take him the toilet but he will usually go to bed (wee first) then not need one til 30 mins after hes woken!

I will just enjoy it as its not a problem to be honest - just seeing if it was just an age thing