How do you know when it's the right time?

[wilson83]

My husband and I decided last summer that we would try for a baby this year. First we agreed to start in Febuary, then I put it back to April and now it has gone to July. How do you know when your ready for a baby?

We both really want one, but keep putting it off because of things like, "we should sort out the garden fences first" or "Shall we buy a new TV first" or "Shall we buy a bigger house??" Really silly things.

I am going back to college in April to get my NVQ 3 in childcare, as my mum, her friend and I are opening a pre-school in September. So then I think, I should put it off until we are settled, but mum has already said the baby will stay with her or my mother in law or I can bring it into work. Everyone is being really supportive,understanding and flexible. I am very lucky to be in my situation.

Sorry - Im going on. Basically, Anyone who has had a baby or is pregnant..how did you know it was the best time? Did you keep putting it off like me? I am so excited about trying and being pregnant, I just want it to be perfect.

X

[meltoadhall]

it may take you up to a year to get pregnant or it might take a month and I personally dont think that you are ever ready for a baby.
but if you think now is the time then just let it happen, stop using contraception and let nature take its course.

[redcrx]

you will never find the ideal time to have a baby as circumstances are forever changing.
I work full time and have and 18 month old at my side 3 days out of those 5. Its hard work, i wont deny it, but I was lucky enough to have a flexible work enviroment.
If i was in your position then I may wait a couple of months purely because trying to get a new business venture is a very stressfull thing. Adding to that the physical aspect of the job then Im sure I wouldnt want to do that in the latter stages of pregnancy.
But as i said thats just what id do, only you can really tell how much maternity leave you could take or if youd be able to manage a new job and a baby.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do though, it really is a rewarding experience.

[wilson83]

Thank you. I am ready (I think). We would be thrilled if we found out we were pregnant now. I haven't been on the pill for over a year, due to medical problems.

I am usually live for now and not what if's. I know how short life is and always try and think like this and so far it has always done me well.

It is so confusing.

[yummymum]

I would just go with the flow, there is not going to be a wrong time if its what you both want and there will always be other things to be done

[My Angel Pie]

Being a parent is 'THE' most wonderful part of life itself. I know about is it the right time etc, i have seen so many business pals and friends all try and 'plan' it just doesn't work that way, all of them took ages to concieve. Go with the flow, relax and most of all have fun. There will always be something to buy for the house, or the latest gadget to you must simply have, but believe me it all fades into insignificance when a little one comes into your life. No matter when it happens it will be 'perfect' . xx

[wilson83]

Thank you for your answers. I must have spoke to dozens of women who have all said the same, including my friends. I have come to the conclusion that you are all right and that I should chill out! But another question to ask...I am very nervous around newborns because they seem so delicate and out of routine, and I am worried I wont cope very well? Is it as bad as I imagine??

[redcrx]

nah, just remember, dont let them see that youre scared lol

Newborns arent quite as delicate as they may seem, think of what they go through during the birth alone.

All new mums worry that they may not know what they are doing but you soon get to grips with it and you should get a fair bit of support from midwives and health visitors too