advice needed on funeral please :)

[bednobs]

hiya, although i may give he impression i can't make a decision on my own, this truly isn't the case - just need some other opinions please. My i am organising the funeral for my son who only lived a few hours. Whan my daughter died last year, we didn't invite anyone to the funeral, it was just the three of us. However, this feels slightl different, as both sets of his grandparents actually met him (whereas my daughter was stillborn, and not seen by anyone else after her birth)
My husband would like to invite the grandparents (plus auntie and cousin who also met him) but i'm not sure really
i know the answer is to do what's right for us, but we both think that's a different thing, what do we do?

[rowanwitch]

I expect you will go back to the grave many times after the funeral...not to say goodbye but just because...
the funeral is just society' way of trying to say its ok to be sad but you are still with the living and in the great scheme of things it may well be less important to you and your OH than the grandparents etc. I would let them come but ask them to stay away afterwards so you can go back knowing you will have time and space on your own... and alsoask them to avoid going on the anniversary
what ever you decide will be 'right' at a time when the whole thing feels so very wrong