Christmas sniping

[suechu]

Three of my four offspring, all in their twenties, take Christmas Day when we're all unusually in the same room, as a great opportunity to 'jokily' belittle and take the p. out of their married sister. I think this actually hurts me more than it does her, or she wouldn't be coming to us again this year, and cooking Christmas dinner!

My question is, how to I cope with this? If I say anything to them they all blame each other and accuse me of making a fuss about nothing. Lovely eh. Advice anyone? Incidentally my husband is no support at all.

[woofgang]

Its your house. if you don't like the behaviour then tell them to give it a rest. Get some old fashioned board games in and get them playing those instead....as the Landlord says "My Gaff, My Rules" They shouldn't be "accusing" you of anything and if they behave like children and try to accuse each other, then treat them like children and say "I don't care who started it I an telling you to stop."

[joko]

many people enjoy a good banter and takng the pish out of close family and friends - its kind of a game or sport i suppose - as long as everyone feels the same and certain lines are never crossed... but its a fine line i think... what could be said just for the craic, may be just a bit too close to home for some... hence why you have to know the people well enough...

[Eve]

Just because she comes doesn't mean it doesn't upset her. There are inevitable comments, nothing too bad but which upset me but I still go back for family Christmas as overall I enjoy it. I just know what to expect now (not just Christmas but that's when I spend most time with family usually) and try to get over it.

People say and take things in different ways and maybe it needs spelling out to the others that they are actually upsetting her (and you) - which they may not realise - and it's not on, especially not in your home at a family Christmas.

I've had to point out that certain things upset me - which apparently wasn't realised - and although it hasn't ceased it's not as bad.