Mum Losing Her Mind

[Cloverjo]

I'm sure there are lots of people on here who have experience of parents losing their minds from dementia or other brain problems. My mum is going this way and I don't know to deal with it yet. I was wondering, if she says something bizarre like - Carol Vorderman gave her her breakfast this morning - is it better to go along with it and ask about Carol or to challenge it and say "don't be silly, mum, she couldn't have."

[Cloverjo]

Thanks to everyone for all the stories and advice. DTC, my mum also has problems with time. She refuses to believe when it's bedtime even though she can see its dark outside and she wears a watch. Mealtimes are also confusing for her. And she keeps asking who was looking after me and my sister when she was in hospital recently.
Thanks again for the words. It does help.

[DTCwordfan]

Time is going here too, we ensure there are plenty of clocks around the house and, largely, she does listen - however, we did have an escape last week and had to call the police as she went missing, the suspicion that she thought she had a dental appointment to attend and buqqer the fact I was taking her into away)

[murraymints]

I cared full time for fil wih Alzheimers,,had the lot aggression, violence, double incontinence , had to tell him every day his wife had passed, I had to cuddle up to him like a baby at times, sit with him till he fell asleep, deal with his fright his fear ..console him in his lucid moments..tend to all his bodily needs.. listen to all his repetative stories etc etc..I found it better for everyone just to humour him..miss him dreadfully, ten years since he passed now...

[sddsddean]

Just thought I'd add this story in about my Mother in law, just to show that some people can be surprisingly human. Before she started getting too bad, MIL had her own 2 bed house. Though my wife used to visit most days and she did have a carer come in for 15 mins twice a day, she was on her own a lot...especially at night. One night she phoned us up saying 'a big black woman' had woken her up and threatened her in her bed, but had since left. Wife got up and drove straight round (about 20 mins). By the time she got there the Police were there ('cos MIL had phoned them). Rather than just dismissing it as a 'batty old woman' as you might expect, they were sitting with her when my wife arrived, made a cup of tea, called an ambulance to make sure she was OK and called in other units (including a dog unit) to do a sweep round the estate to try and reassure her that she was in no danger. I'm not having a go at Plod, but I was quite surprised they went to all that trouble on a 'false alarm'. We even wrote to the Chief Inspector to thank the PC and WPC for their concern. Just goes to show!