Looking After Grandson

[malagabob]

What problems could I/We encounter if I/We came to an agreement with my grandsons mother/father, and all parties were happy for us to permanently look after our grandson. We are elderly but fit.

[EDDIE51]

^ Yes, very important you MUST be registered as his legal guardians.

[jennyjoan]

This is my personal feeling - do think that the little boy should be with his parents.

[EDDIE51]

I have been thinking about this and I am sure that to do it legally you need an order from the family court. We are talking about the natural parents giving up all responsibility for their own child , and I don't think the court would allow it unless there was an overwhelming reason for it. The family court CAN ONLY MAKE ONE POSSIBLE DECISION in any case dealing with the care of a child/children and that is to do
' 'Whatever is in the best interest of the child' '
no other ruling is even possible. The child's interest overrides all other considerations.
You do not say why you want to do this and I am sure you have your reasons for that. But, to get sole guardianship , you and the parents will have to put your case to the family court and abide by whatever they decide to be in the child's' best interest. It may not be the decision you hope for. A child is not property like a car for example that can be given away if you want to. When the child is 10 the court will ask the child what he or she wants to happen. They are not compelled to go with the child wants but from age 10 the child's wishes / views must be taken into consideration.

[kvalidir]

Generally you can have an informal arrangement whereby your grandchildren live with you but their parent ultimately retain parental responsibility and by pass the Family Court and as long as relations are good with his parents then fine. Once a child has lived with you for I think it's three years there is a simple process of applying for a residence order which is only a single form but might be better to get a solicitor to do this for you, costs a few hundred pounds. A parental responsibility order can also be obtained at the same time. No need to involve social services etc unless you really have to, but not knowing why you want to have your grandson living with you makes it slightly hard to answer. You most certainly are not too old either. I hope everything works out for you.x

[malagabob]

Thanks everyone’s input. Without going into details I believe We could give him a better quality of life in is early years

[murraymints]

make sure it is all agreed in a formal manner..child allowance etc in your name..and a written agreement properly drawn up and signed would not go amiss... very best of luck to you, you are clearly very good and kind people xx

[mikey4444]

I occasionally look after my great nephew, and I love him to bits, but I am nearly 65 and he is an extremely active 6 year old, and at the end of the day, I need a very large G+T !

[ummmm]

malagabob - do his parents agree with you?

[kvalidir]

It's very hard to judge from what you say if there is a problem with his current home life, but essentially if there isn't anything wrong with his parents and the way they are raising him, then his place is with them, and if it's 'quality of life' he's lacking maybe you can help them in other ways to enjoy it with his parents with you in your normal capacity as grandparents.

[EDDIE51]

What made me mention the family court is that you say ''permanently look after him'' That implies that you want to take him over totally from the parents. Unless there is a formal agreement the parents can just demand that he comes back to them at any time without giving a notice or reason. That is going to cause problems with school just for a start.

[anneasquith]

Without knowing the full details of your grandsons background( which is non of our business) , all parties must be in agreement including GS. Good luck.

[EDDIE51]

^ yes I am sure that some form of formal agreement is vital !
Unless you are the legal guardians you can not consent to medical / hospital treatment he may need for example.

[Barsel]

God forbid that this should happen any time soon, but if you were to leave this world within the next 10 years, would your husband be able to manage to bring the boy up on his own? This also could be your husband who passes on, could you cope on your own?

[ummmm]

In 10 years time the child will be an adult.

[Barsel]

That's why I said 'within' the next 10 years.