5th Granchild.

[maggie01]

My daughter has just told me she is expecting baby no 5. I know I should be please but no one in the right mind has 5 children in this day and age. It is none of my buisness but I don't know how to tell my husband as he will just go off on one. She had her first one at 19 and he feels she has wasted her life and I can't face being the one to tell him there is to be another baby. Should I just wait untill he sees her and finds out for himself or just get on with it.

[ummmm]

Why does no one in their right mind have 5 children? One of my friends has 14 and another has 13. All planned and loved I should add.

It's her choice

[maggie01]

Sorry didn't mean to be offensive but that is just my opinion. Years ago there were big families but it is not that usual now. The cost being a big factor. I know love comes free but unfortunately the things they want to keep up with their friends doesn't

[ummmm]

Your not offensive, so no need to be sorry.

It's too late now anyway. you may as well tell your husband and get it over and done with. He'll probably go off on one even more if he finds out you didn't tell him.

Damage limitation!!

[yolande]

I can understand your view, but this is your daughter and her family's choice not yours and your husbands. Parents will probably never quite agree with what their children do. Would you rather she had had none and you had no grandchildren? Maybe you should both be happy that you brought up a woman who could give so much love.

[maggie01]

Yolande. Not at all. Obviously there is more to the story for which I don't want to disclose but as you say it is their life not ours except it has a funny way of involving us when things don't quite work out. That's what parents are for I guess. thanks for the replies I will break the news when he comes home.

[4getmenot]

thats so sad that you put will have to break the news. Should be really happy news, I dont know your families present situation but your daughter seems happy enough about this. Be happy for them xx

[saxy_jag]

I know a family who has seven children. They're Irish Catholics, which seems to make most people think the worst when I mention it. However, the parents are both doctors and are able to support the kids adequately - they are a super family and I'm always pleased to bump into them.

I don't have a problem with large families under these circumstances - the parents are responsible and absolutely not a drain or a burden on anyone. They have been prepared to make material sacrifices for their kids which, from what Maggie has said, her daughter may have difficulty doing.

I think, Maggie, it's up to your daughter to tell your hubby. Why should you have to take the flack? When he's calmed down, I think all you can both do is just let her and her partner get on with it. Sooner or later, they will realise they can't have everything. Hopefully they will then make the right choice.

[maggie01]

Saxy_jag. Thank you for seeing where I am coming from.
caz1975. You couldn't be more wrong. We may not be happy about it but he/she would never be treated any differently from the others. I know my husband will come round by the time baby is here, he will just take time to get used to it. I would never ever leave any of them out whether they are perfect (which none of us are) are not. Sorry you're family treat yours differently.

[spudqueen]

One of my friends has 5 children, her youngest started school in September. It was her choice and she is very happy with her family.

I'm sure your daughter doesn't feel that she's wasted her life, she's brought/bringing 5 children into the world, and as long as she and they are happy what is there to worry about?

[bubblegum-31]

hi ive got four children that were all planned and recently i had a false alarm i thought i was pregnant and admit at first i was a bit scared at the prospect of coping with five kids but then when i thought about it i knew that no matter wot i would cope and then it turned out i wasnt pregnant and i felt a bit gutted about it i had started to hope i was. i think you should be congratulating your daughter and giving her all the love and support she needs right now and the same for your husband. its her life and if having five children makes her happy then it should be something to celebrate, give your daughter a big hug and try not to worry, this is what she wants so be proud of her,
i hope everything works out well for you all. merry xmas

[maggie01]

Thanks everyone.Everything is ok now. Shock at first but I am sure everything will be fine.

[druiaghtagh]

Just be happy for her and support her as much as you ca, i wish i had more Grandkids, only got 4 Grandaughters !!

[maggie01]

Everyone is calm now and can see that she is happy, so we will be happy for her and the family. We have several events to look forward to in the new year and this will be the first one of the year.