The chasm between ....

[OBonio]

.. single mates with no kids and us...

We had Little OBonio's 2nd birthday party yesterday. A lovely little do which was attended by all and sundry who are important in her life thus far.

Except one. Her god father. Having seen him the night before briefly and him saying yes, he'd be there, but only for an hour. I then receive a text message half an hour after it's all started saying 'I'm not gonna make it'.

This morning I get an email with an apology of sorts. Turns out he went on a bender Saturday night and felt really rough. So went up the pub again for someone else's 40th 'party'.

Have we chosen a complete muppet for a god father?

[B00]

Nawwww, just someone who's idea of fun, especially with a headache isn't a party for a 2 year old. Was he thoughtless? Yes maybe, but certainly not a muppet. When's Mini OBonio number two arriving?

And happy belated birthday Mino OBonio :-)

[OBonio]

Maybe I should have also said he's only seen her 4 or 5 times since she was born. He lives 4 miles away. I just get the feeling we've made a bit of a mistake. I used to think he was someone we could rely on, but after this... I dunno.

Mini OBonio v2.0 is set to arrive end of October. 23rd is the estimated DoA. Still a few weeks yet. Getting Little OBonio into her own bed this week to free up the cot :o)

[yinyang]

We haven't even seen one of our girls godfathers since they were one ( about four years ago).I was never that keen on him to be honest, but he'd been my husbands best friend since high school. Trouble was, age nearly thirty he still thought ha was in high school - long hair, heavy metal t-shirt and leather jacket with chains, no career cause he was sure his band were going to make it !
They just drifted apart. My husband went all respectable and hard working and any free time he had he wanted to spent with us.The other guy took the huff ,they just stopped calling each other.
The other godfather, who is also single, does at least try. he comes for dinner about once a month and always brings the girls a huge bag of sweets that I would never let them have; so of course the girls adore him. Even at that he's always coming up with mad schemes for himself and my husband that usually involve me staying at home for days while husband goes off and spends all our money. Don't mind them havind the odd weekend away but spending New years in New York - no chance!
Anyway, as Boo said, I think kid's parties just aren't fun for those who don't have kids. My sister, who has no children, could not be dragged kicking and screaming to a party full of noisy little people but always sees the girls at a family dinner within a couple of days.
It doesn't mean your mate doesn't care, sounds like he's just not up on the whole responsibility thing yet. Maybe invite him round for dinner one night, then when little ones in bed, go out for a pint and mention you feel like you've hardly seen him for the last couple of years.

Also.. sometimes, just sometimes, don't you listen to your childless friends talking about the places they've been, the films they've been to see and just think 'wish i still had that freedom' x

[EngTeach]

I am single and gomother to two beautiful girls. One is my niece, the other a friend's daughter. My niece lives downstairs from me so of course I am always involved in her life. The other god daughter now lives one hour away, but before that I saw her frequently and always attend the parties. Now that she is school-aged I don't go to the classmates party, but always go to the family/friends party. You couldn't keep me away. I've been to more of her events than her blood aunt has. Perhaps the problem lies with the fact that these unreliable god parents are all men, Though another friend has a single man as her son's god f ather and he is always around too.

All single people are not flaky and unreliable. Quite frankly my married with children friends are more likely to cancel or be late than any of my single friends.

I am older (38), but have become tired of marrieds thinking I have a carefree life with no responsibilities: I have career, mortgage, and am pretty much sole supporter/care taker for an ailing mother. I do this on one salry not two as many married couple do. Because I am single without children it was assumed by married or child bearing siblings I would do this alone without question.

So it's not all of us singletons, maybe just the one's you've chosen.

[888sally888]

I wouldnt wory too much - godparents do seem to drift in and out of childrens lives generally.

I suppose to me the most important issue is my daughters having decent reliable legal guardians in case I peg it too young!!

Make sure you think about this issue and make provision in you wills. Sorry - I sounds ssssooooo morbid!!x

[Mammar]

We chose a married couple of friends to be god-parents to our eldest daughter and although they live in the same town we lost touch with them after a few years - different lives, busy, you know the thing.
We stop to talk to them when we pass in the street and that's it! No hassle - we've never really needed them in all this time. If you want serious god-parents I think you're perhaps safer choosing close family members but I never really needed ours!