Mothers refuse to swap back their children

[AB Asks]

A story hit the headlines this week after it came out that two mothers who had their babies mixed at birth in the Czech town of Trebic. For the last ten months they have each been raising each other's children. One of the mothers yesterday was adamant that she could not give up what she had always thought was her baby. However, eventually the mothers will have to swap their babies back. What do you think? Could you swap your baby back after ten months?

[4getmenot]

will they really have to?? If they both want to keep who they know as their child can they not adopt eachothers?

[redcrx]

No I couldnt!

The problem is that if one or both want to swap then it has to be done.

How will those girls feel when they are older and find out that they were brought up and supposedly loved by women who then gave them away at 10 months old and swapped them for another?

From what i saw on the news it seemed as if one was happy to give up the child she had raised as her own as if it was a jumper that didnt fit! I think that if one wants to give up 'her child' like that and the other doesnt then perhaps put both babies with a mum who would love them regardless.

Well thats what Id do in an ideal world, but of course thats not a situation arrising from an ideal world.

[gina32]

i seen the item on tv and what i understood was that they will gradually swop the girls over a time so it will easier for both the parents and the children. and in answer to your question, i really dont know if i would be able to.

[jane1098]

to be honest...i dont know. weighing up all the pros and cons especially the heart ache. its too difficult.

[boobesque]

This has caused quite a stir on a parenting forum I use, a majority of mums are saying they wouldn't swap back.
I have a 1 year old and the thought of giving her back at 10 days let alone 10 months is awful - Emmy is my shadow where I go, she goes, and the bond we have is so strong, i couldn't let her go.

[mycats]

Strangely enough we were talking about this very thing a couple of months ago on another site, I couldnt do it, no way!! My son is my life and if they turned round now and said he wasnt biologically mine I could NOT give him up

[andrea81]

This situation would break my heart, how on earth to be torn like this. I would feel so much love towards the child who I was bringing up, to ask me not to love that child as my own would break my heart. But I wouln't be able to stop thinking about my biological child and if she was ok.

My heart goes out to them, I hope a happy ending is in sight for them!

[jedimistress]

I think it'll be a very happy ending. Each child will have 4 adults who love them very much.

[smudge]

I was talking about this to my husband last night & the fact that both mothers have breast fed & loved each others babies from birth, just doesn't bear thinking about.

Although, however extermely heartbreaking & difficult to hand over a baby you've nurtured for 10 months, I would find it very hard not to have my own biogical child back with me & her 'real' family.

If the parents do have a change of heart & decide to swap back, I think the only way to do it, would be to live in close proximity to each other, then gradually get used to your own baby & them to you.

At least they are still very young & as time passes, probably wouldn't remember being handed over, even if you told them at a later date - please God.....

[boobesque]

I think I am quite odd, I wouldn't hand over Emmy and knowing the other child was well looked after would be enough for me. My partner finds that strange, but i know from experience that blood means nothing really.

I know every little thing about Emmy, I have and still am feeding her myself, and I know what her little noises and cries mean, to hand her over to someone who wouldn't is beyond the realms of my imagination.

Strangely enough, when I had Emmy i had to have an operation and kept saying over and over to my mum and mr boob not to let Emmy out of their sight, I was so paranoid!

[aims1202]

I heard this story and thought straight away i would never in a million years be able to give up my boy, not at 10mths and not any age. It wouldnt matter to me if i found out he wasnt my biological child, i would love him just the same.
I think the right thing to do is for them to keep the baby they have brought up and loved for 10mths, but the parents should be able to have a close relationship with their biological child and see them all the time, be a big part of their lives. I think the children should be told what happened as they grow up. This way they have even more people who adore them. I think separating them now from the only parents they know would affect them later on.

[smudge]

Although I just couldn't bear the thought of it happening to me, I think the reason I would strongly desire to have my own child back in my arms, is because someone very close to me had a son adopted at birth & never, ever got over it. All she had was a tiny black & white photo of him.

Three years ago, I found her long lost son for her & he had desparately been looking for her too.

They have been happily reunited ever since & to see the closeness & family resemblance after 39 years is overwhelming for everyone.

Hope yo understand.....

[smudge]

*you