god-children....

[blu3wave]

can they ever repalce having children of your own? They wouldn't for me, but am interested to hear your views on this, thxxx

[excelsior]

they do for me. i'm single with no family - but i have two lovely god-daughters. and i love them like my own

[redcrx]

i dont think theyd ever be a 'replacement' as you suggest, but people get a lot out of seeing them grow up and having a place in their lives.

Children have a lot to give, and its lovely to be a recipient of that whether they are your own or someone elses.

[blu3wave]

yes yes, but you can only know the difference, once you have kids of your own. Everybody wants to adopt if they cannot have kids, but they'd give anything to have children of their own first.

[cazzz1975]

the thought of you being broody is almost stomach churning blu3

[annie0000]

I don't think that you would have the overwhelming sense of responsibility and guilt that comes with being a parent.

I think that being a god parent would allow you to take a step back and enjoy the good times and be a support without the worry and concern that comes with trying to ensure that you are doing the right thing for your child.

I absolutely love my kids to bits and enjoy the love and joy that they bring, but I also feel that someone put a lead weight on my shoulders the day that they were born that will be there for the rest of my life. Even when I am not with them, I am thinking about them.

I don't have god children, but do have nieces and nephews that were around before my kids were born. And whilst I have a great relationship with them and love them dearly, they are their parents responsibility to raise as happy, good citizens, not mine and it was much easier to indulge them without considering the consequences. That is a luxury you don't have with your own.

[Drisgirl]

O I was a godmother - must be at least twentyish years ago.
It was seen at the time as a such an honour -religion didnt play a part -it was sorry to say an excuse for a party.
I lost touch with her and havent a clue where she is -sad really.

Im not religious at all so didnt see the significance in it.
I however did have both my children christened ???????

Now- I would have a party to celebrate the birth of my children and leave out the churchy bit.(Can say that cos there isnt a channce of it lol)

[dot.hawkes]

I had two Godmothers as was the tradition, one is still alive and she will be 80 next year, my Mum's cousin, the other was an old school friend of my Mum's and she dies at Christmas 2000, 10 months after my Mum, my Godmnother left me a bequest in her will. For all of my life both Godmothers sent me cards on my birthday and at christamas, my surviving Godmother, though marrying in 1954, was unable to have children of her own, but did adopt a baby boy in 1956,the year after i was born, and for 20 years I had a cousin who was my hero. then he went bad and started getting into trouble, and he had been out of everyone of our lives ever since. My Godmother never mentions him and she writes to me every few months. It is quite sad really, she sends me a cheque every birthday and at Christmas.

[Drisgirl]

Aww Dot -that truly is the old fashioned way isnt it -sad about what happened tho.
My mum was a Sunday School Teacher -and then look at me -she has had the DNA the lot and now accepts I am indeed her child -but that generation firmly believe in the duty attched to the honour of being a Godparent.

My 2 have Godparents -well one is my sis (so she wouldnt miss anything anyway) and the other a dear friend and old neighbour and she doesnt miss either one of them -she is churchy tho and takes it seriously.
I feel awkward a bit -almost like a fraud.

[Pesk]

My godmother (now 80) takes her role very seriously - when my mum died 20 years ago, my godmum rang me more, checked up on me, showed an interst in what I was doing, ,my kids etc. She's been great.
My 2 kids have god parents. my daughter's take it seriously and keep in touch, my son's don't and he misses out.
I'm a godparent and I see my role of stepping in if both parents aren't around. I'm "religious" so I pray for my godchildren - something there's not enough of.

[aims1202]

I think you can have a very strong bond with other peoples children, god children or not. Before i had my son I looked after a close friends daughter 3/4 days a week, from the age of 10 weeks until she was 2 yrs old. We were very close, i love her to bits and now she is 7yrs old we still are very close. In between those years her mum has had a lot of problems, and she has not had an easy childhood, she has moved between living with her mum and then her dad lots of times. I have often really worried about her, even loosing sleep over worrying and the fact i could not always do anything to help made it even worse. I dont think it is the same as having your own child but i think you can love them just as much and also can worry about them too.

[EngTeach]

I am single and have no children. i have 2 beautiful god daughters. One is my niece that lives with her mum and me, the other is the daighter if my very besy friend. I love them to death. My friend now lives an hour away and i don't see them as much as I used to. they used to be 2 minutes away. I would do anything for my niece. at some point my sis is asking her no-good ex to sign off his rights. This will ope a huge custody battle. I am prepared to mortgage the house if it comes to that. He has seen her 5 times in last 3 years, and has given about $200. in support. I treat her like my own and share equally in her care with my sister. Though I know that these 2 girls are not the same as having my own, I have accepted that I probably won't marry/have a family of my own, and give my love and time to these two cutie pies.

[blu3wave]

Well, it seems you've made up your mind not to having any of your own, so at least you've got some company in the meantime....